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CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

STARDATE 57653.98
 APRIL 18, 2381
 0655 HRS

[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor’s Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn: @Swift , @stardust

Hathev sat behind her desk sipping her coffee.  She had just concluded a meeting of the counseling staff and while the daily meeting had proven generally productive, today’s gathering had been almost disturbing.   Lieutenant Foster had shown up with a recently broken nose.  She had seen him the evening before, and the nose had been fine which meant something had happened overnight.  

The Lieutenant had been tight lipped about it when she had privately inquired as to the cause of the injury.   He’d alluded to being woken up in the middle of the night due to loud music coming from his neighbor’s quarters, and that he’d had a small accident before attempting to go back to bed.  He had been elusive on other details.  

He had, however, given her enough.  It took only a moment to pull up the crew quarters assignment and discover that one of Foster’s neighbors was none other than Lt. JG Kate Foster.  While she was not one to focus on such things, Hathev had heard about tension between the Fosters and a quick pull on the younger Foster’s service record gave Hathev more than enough cause to warrant following up.  

Tension among the crew was common on board any ship.  Under current circumstances, it was even moreso on board Theurgy.  However, if there had been an overnight altercation between the Foster siblings, one that had potentially ended in violence, such an occurrence could not be tolerated and under there were sizable penalties imposed on those who assaulted other crewmen and it was her duty to report her suspicions.

But as she pondered the situation, she considered another tact.   While not prevalent in Vulcans, human children often found themselves engaged in ‘sibling rivalry’.  For most, it passed and the siblings in question often found more constructive ways to develop their relationship.   But some, had not.   She had to allow for the possibility that this incident was more of a domestic disagreement and less an all-out malicious assault.  If that were the case, it was also her duty to provide a therapeutic approach to resolving those differences.
 To that end, she owed it to Ms. Foster to hear out the situation before deciding exactly what her duties demanded.

She tapped her communicator.

“Lieutenant Commander Hathev to Lieutenant Junior Grade Foster- Report to my office, Deck 11 Vector 2, Immediately.”

She kept her voice neutral yet stern, betraying no emotion, but putting just enough emphasis on the instruction and the use of full rank as opposed to colloquial nicety, that it would be understood as the order it was and not a request.  Further she omitted the typical human niceties of using words such as “please” or “at your earliest convenience”.  

Just because she owed it to Foster to hear her out, did not mean she needed to be flexible about it.

Tagged @stardust due to character referencing.  This starter was deveolped in conjunction with both @stardust and @Swift .  If either of you object to how I set this up, especially if @stardust has an objection to how I portrayed how Stellan would respond to Hathev's inquiry, please let me know and I'll be happy to adjust accordingly.

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #1 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

To say Kate was agitated this morning would have been a grave understatement, as emotionally she was still reeling from the incredibly heated exchange that she’d had with her brother the night before, which couldn’t possibly have come at a worse time. It had pretty much ruined an otherwise exceedingly pleasant day in which she had not only further built upon her friendship with Vinata Vojona, but in which she had also met Scruffy Leblanc and sparked a seemingly shared interest in each other over their late dinner together. It had worked wonders in repairing her somewhat shattered self-confidence, but that had been undone by a series of pointed, smug, and generally disrespectful remarks thrown at her by Stellan. He had always had an innate ability to deconstruct her down to her very deepest core, and once he had, he would leave her in utter and total shambles. For the most part, it was only her work which had kept her from being a total mess this morning, but she very much desired a chance to just crawl back into bed and cry herself to sleep. In the absence of drug abuse, it had become her go-to remedy, though it may have been equally as unhealthy from a certain point of view.

“I need something to do.” Leant up against a bulkhead, Kate watched as Nurse Ellison saw to her rounds.

“Well, I think for the most part we’re caught up on busy work.” Replied the fellow blonde with a timid smile, able to sense the tenuousness in the face of the Chief Surgeon.

Nodding, Kate averted her gaze as she tried not to ponder the depths of her thoughts any further. Instead, she found herself examining the bruises upon the knuckles on her right hand. It had still ached, though she supposed in comparison to the injury unleashed upon her victim, it was a small price to pay. In a way, she regretted her actions, but to an extent she felt her brother had more than warranted the punch to his nose that he had received. He just refused to let up on the hurtful things he was accusing her of; clearly trying to get a satisfactory rise out of her, as was often the game. Normally, she would have just stormed off to her quarters to sob, but as she was already in them, he was intruding upon that bit of refuge, and backed into a proverbial corner she had snapped. Rubbing the knuckles with her other hand, she considered treating the bruises with a regenerative probe. She knew she should have done it already but hadn’t found the time as she had only just barely managed to make it for her early morning appointment with Lieutenant Koilos for his exam.

Jumping as she heard her name called, Kate straightened to attention as she was pulled out of her momentary malaise. Realizing that the voice was coming via her combadge, Kate slapped at it in a bit of a panic as the voice identified herself as Lieutenant Commander Hathev.

“Oh! Umm... yes, sorry!” she replied, only to hear that she was being ordered to meet in person, and before she could respond further the channel closed.

“Shit!” She exclaimed loud enough for Ellison to hear, prompting the Nurse to raise a curious brow. Affording her an apologetic look, Kate excused herself from the Primary Care Unit and slowly began moving in the direction of where Hathev’s office was located. ‘What is this about? Was there a hint of agitation in the voice of the Chief Counselor? No. Couldn’t have been. She’s Vulcan, isn’t she?’ Swallowing audibly, she suddenly found herself feeling a little cold, and wished she hadn’t forgone her white Doctor’s coat this morning. ‘Did Stellan report me? He must have. The bastard! It wasn’t good enough that he ruined my night, now he has to further harm my career?’ Crossing her arms over her chest, she began to worry about what kind of disciplinary actions might be taken. Once more, she was struggling at the behest of her brother, and she imagined that it had all been planned out by him. How he pushed her to the brink. He knew she would snap, and that there would be some kind of consequences for it. This was just another example of his trying to control, and experiment with her as if she was his lab rat.

Finding herself moderately fueled by a sense of aggravation at this realization, Kate picked up her pace a little as she drew nearer to the Counselor’s office at the opposite end of Main Sickbay. Stopping at the receptionist’s desk, she didn’t even try to muster any kind of a pleasant smile for the woman sat there. “I’m here to see Commander Hathev.” She remarked dryly, remembering for a moment how the Counselor had deliberately made a point of their respective ranks when she’d contacted her.

“She’s expecting you.” The receptionist replied.

Taking a deep breath, Kate brushed her blonde hair back behind her ears as she strode in through the door which led to the office. “Lieutenant Junior Grade, Kate Foster. Reporting as requested, Ma’am.” She’d hated using the more formal means of introduction, but figured it was due, given the subject she assumed they were likely to be discussing.

‘Bastard.’ She thought in regard to her brother, as she averted her tangerine eyes from Commander Hathev.


OOC: Likewise, tagging Stardust due to the obvious reference of her character. ;)

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #2 –
[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor's Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn: @Swift , @stardust 

Try as though she might, Hathev found it difficult to suppress the frustration she felt.  Had she been human she might have cited a lack of proper sleep, but in her case it was the lack of proper mediation and her ongoing struggle to understand the emotions that had been pushing against her for the past two weeks.  That, however, was her burden to bear, she knew and it would be inappropriate to visit that upon Ms. Foster.  

Still, as the young woman entered her office and reported, Hathev found herself scrutinizing the Junior Lieutenant and willing herself to suppress the emotional response and view the situation dispassionately.  For only that approach would find an appropriate resolution.  There, of course, was the matter of potential assault against another member of the crew for which remedial action had to be taken, but there was the greater issue at hand.  It was that issue upon which Hathev would focus once the more immediate concern was properly addressed.

She did not put the younger woman at ease, nor did she offer her a seat, or the hospitality of her replicator as was her custom during her counseling sessions.

“Lieutenant,” she began, her voice neutral and dispassionate.  “This morning your elder brother attended the departmental meeting showing evidence of a recently broken nose.   As I know for a fact that he did not have this injury when I last saw him yesterday, the only logical conclusion is that he received said injury over the nighttime hours”

She let that hang for a moment.

“I don’t suppose you would happen to know how he received such an injury?”

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #3 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

The exchange with her brother was still incredibly fresh within her mind. All of it, in fact. She had tried to expunge it from her forethoughts, but as was often the case, that was an easier task said than done. Stellan had always had a way of lingering in the back of her mind; like an ever-present and annoying tumor which offered unending critique and analysis of every thought or thing she’d ever had or did. Previous Counselors had explained that it was just her subconscious at play, and while she hadn’t exactly denied or refused their explanation, she also knew that there were times when his voice wasn’t just a manifestation of her own but was instead very much the result of her brother intruding upon her consciousness. He had after all, done it throughout much of her life whenever they were younger. He would project his thoughts unto her without warrant or permission. Sometimes even across great distances. It was all meant to drive her to the brink of insanity and beyond. At least, that’s what she had assumed to be his motivations. Once she had even tried to explain all of this to one of said past Counselors, only for them to have not only flat-out rejected it as a possibility, but they had also subsequently prescribed Kate with an additional course of mandatory Counseling sessions, which she’d absolutely loathed.

Waiting with modicum of nervousness as she stood before the Vulcan Chief Counselor at her desk, Kate remembered that feeling of loathing from before rather vividly. How she had hated having her thoughts analyzed. Not because she didn’t understand the necessity of it, but because it seemed like everyone who ever had, did so with healthy dose of pessimism and pretentiousness behind their approach.

“Ma’am.” She croaked as Hathev began her questioning.

Indeed the injury she’d rendered unto Stellan had been noticed, though it would have been surprising had it not been. Naturally, given the aptly documented history which existed between Kate and Stellan, it only made sense that she was brought in as a likely suspect. Though, the question still remained, as the Commander hadn’t necessarily revealed as to whether or not her brother had directly implicated her as the culprit. In fact, it was made somewhat clear by the Vulcan as she asked rather plainly of Kate if she had an inkling as to how Stellan had received his duly broken nose. Was it an attempt to catch her in a lie? Kate hadn’t come to know the Chief Counselor yet, at all for hat matter, but she was fairly certain that Vulcans could be exceedingly cunning in how they approached delicate situations. No, it was likely that the Commander had adopted the simplest explanation as to the cause of her Assistant’s injury, which in this particular instance meant that Kate had probably been the one behind it. With a sigh, the Chief Surgeon pushed aside the potential of lying about it, which Kate had legitimately been considering prior to actually standing in Hathev’s intimidating presence.

“I... umm... I do know. Ma’am.” The fact that she was left standing without any offer of usual pleasantries wasn’t lost on Kate, and likely had the desired effect as it intensified the feeling of nervousness in the pit of her stomach. Clearing her throat as it suddenly felt exceedingly dry, Kate averted her unsure gaze away from any possible meeting of the Chief Counselor’s.

“I caused the injury. Ma’am.” she admitted plainly.

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #4 –
[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor's Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn: @Swift , @stardust 
 
Hathev sat back in her seat, allowing her demeanor to relax as she re-appraised Ms. Foster.   She had not anticipated an admission, despite it being the most logical course of action.   Her respect for the Lieutenant increased, despite the circumstances of this otherwise awkward meeting.

“Your candor is both noted and appreciated, Lieutenant,” she conceded.  “Please take a seat,” she said as she motioned to one of the guest chairs opposite her desk. 

This was not the first time she had to mediate a dispute between crewmembers, nor was it the first time she had to mediate a dispute between family members.   Yet, for some reason this issue seemed unique.  Perhaps it was due to the lack of options available to her given the ship’s current renegade status.  Even so, the option to transfer one of the two parties off the assignment was always the last recourse she would chose to pursue short of extenuating circumstances.

She did not know for certain where this would go, and she found herself questioning whether or not she would need to put brother and sister on the couch together in a form of family counseling.

One step at a time.

“Please tell me what occurred, Lieutenant”

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #5 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Chief Counselor's Office | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

In truth, there was a bitter pang of regret which was stinging at Kate in the back of her mind over what had unfolded during the course of the night, though it wasn’t born out of any concern for the harm she had caused unto her brother. No, she simply hated that she would now have to deal with the consequences of those actions. Meanwhile, Stellan, who knew what he was doing, and thrived on getting a rise out of his sister, wouldn’t have word one said to him about his continued abuse of her. It was more of the same. His ability to manipulate her, and then spin things around so that he was seemingly innocent in whatever altercation occurred as a result, was a skill she recognized all too well. Yet, regardless of how keenly she understood what he was doing, she still couldn’t stop herself from falling into the same traps he laid for her over, and over again. The way he would play her; preying on her tumultuous torrent of demons and emotions was utterly masterful. And as a result, she had now landed here before the Chief Counselor, and potentially in a position where her past record combined with this latest incident would paint an unfavorable picture of her, and who she really was.

Her career had only just barely been on the mend, and now even aboard a rogue starship, it may well have been in danger.

Surprisingly though, the frosty welcome she had initially received from the Vulcan seemed to warm ever so slightly as Hathev acknowledged an appreciation of Kate’s decision to be truthful, rather than obfuscate the facts. Funny, how such a decision had been born of fear over begin easily caught by a woman would invariably see right through any attempts of lying, had been received with positivity. All the same, Kate counted it as a minor moral victory at the beginning of what she assumed would be a lengthy review of her behavior, and a series of difficult losses at the expense of her already fractured self-confidence. Taking the seat as offered though, she afforded the Counselor her first actual direct glance since being in her presence and hoped that her gaze wouldn’t so obviously betray the sense of discomfort, worry, and guilt that was plaguing her. Unsure of what to do with her hands, she wound up folding them in front of herself, then setting them on her lap a little nervously. “Thank you, Ma’am.” Swallowing hard again, she tried to still the hyper-active heart that was beating in her chest, fueled by the concern she had about what kind of disciplinary action might need to take place.

Clearing her throat, Kate hesitated a moment to try and find the right words to try and explain all that had happened.

“Well... umm... Ma’am, I’m not sure how well informed you are regarding my relationship with my brother. Or how aware of our history you are, but in general we’ve never really seen eye-to-eye. On anything.” Realizing that she hadn’t been asked to describe their past, but rather what specifically had happened the night before, Kate took a deep breath. It would take hours upon hours of sessions for Hathev to truly understand the intricacies and full history which existed between Kate and Stellan, and even then, Kate still doubted that the Vulcan would see things from her perspective. After all, as far as she was concerned, none of her previous Counselors had been able to understand or had even attempted to understand things according to her. As far as she had always felt, it always seemed like she was being painted as the bad guy, and her brother as the victim. So it was with an audible sigh that Kate judged Hathev in accordance with all the previous Counselors she had ever dealt with and accepted the idea that she was about to be reprimanded. That she would once more be told how her actions toward her brother were unjustified, and then be instructed to adjust her behavior or face discipline.

“Ma’am, Stellan came to my quarters last night, complaining of noise. He entered, made some... remarks... I lost my cool and hit him.” She knew there was way more to the story, but figured it was probably better to just cut her losses short and take the hit she was about to. There was simply no point in trying to convince anyone of her brother’s wrong-doing. There never had been.

Averting her gaze once more, Kate felt drained of energy as she was relented to her pitiful situation.

Re: CH02: S [D03 | 0655] - Playing Parent

Reply #6 –
[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor's Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn:  @stardust, @Swift 

It did not require a Betazoid to see just how nervous Lt. Foster had become.  It was a situation Hathev could understand as she had been aware of Foster’s checkered past, but she did not strike the counselor as someone who was looking to throw away the opportunity she had been given and she could yet be a strong asset to the crew.   No this situation warranted correction, not discipline.  Even so, Foster had to know the potential consequences of her actions. 

“Again, I note and thank you for your candor, Lieutenant.”  She kept her voice neutral.  “Given what little direct knowledge I have on this matter I see multiple issues, each of which need to be addressed in their own way.   I’m sure you understand that, regardless of how you may or may not have been provoked, your actions can be considered an act of assault on another crewmember.   I do not have to tell you the potential consequences of those actions.”

She paused to allow that to sink in.  

“However, given the nature of the circumstances of the incident, I believe a more constructive resolution is called for in this case and I do not believe a formal report on this matter is warranted.  That said I strongly recommend you put in to have your quarters moved so it is no longer adjacent to those of your brothers.   If you wish for me to add my endorsement to your request, I will do so.  Second, you must commit, to me, that this incident will *not* be repeated.  Third, in order to help facilitate your afore mentioned commitment to me, I believe guided counseling is warranted.   While it is within my prerogative to order you into such a regimen, I find that forced counseling is often less effective than it would be if the patient, in this case you, were to attend willingly.”

Hathev allowed another moment. 

“I am aware of your previous mandatory counseling, though given our current conditions, I do not have access to those notes.   I do not wish to add another ‘black mark’ to your service record.   Quite the contrary, I see great potential in you, and it is my intention to help you work through these and any other issues, in a constructive and collaborative way.”

Re: CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

Reply #7 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Chief Counselor's Office | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

Swirling around Kate’s mind was an absolute torrent of various thoughts, emotions, and worries. Almost all of them entirely focused on her fractious relationship with her brother, their shared past, and how her career had seemed to constantly be in the balance as a result. It was utterly and completely frustrating for her to know that even indirectly, he was having an effect on her; that even when he wasn’t actively pillaging her brain with his telepathy, he was annoyingly dictating the manner in which she functioned. She felt like a puppet who was technically free from her strings, but who was invariably and inescapably somehow still tied to the puppeteer’s hand. It was driving her mad. It had been driving her mad for years. Decades even. Even now, as her tangerine-hued eyes peered about the modest confines of the Commander’s office, she couldn’t help but feel like there was something other than her truly at the controls. It was a ludicrous thing to think, and she knew that all too well, but it didn’t mean she could easily dismiss the thought.

Blinking as she became aware of how it was likely that the Vulcan Counselor could detect the tumultuousness of her mind, Kate struggled to find something which she could focus on as a distraction, finally latching onto a spinning Starfleet delta that appeared on the LCARS monitor behind Hathev’s head. Like an anchor cast into the abyss, she traced the outline of it in her mind, and listened as the Commander began speaking once more. “But...” she’d started to contest the assertion that it was an act of ‘assault’, but thought better of it, and ultimately decided against interrupting again. When there was finally a moment afforded to her, Kate let her mouth open as if she were going to speak, yet no words came to mind. Instead, she let her lips closed shut as she found the wherewithal to actually look at Hathev, rather than just beyond her. “I... understand, Ma’am.” Her acknowledgement was a reluctant one, but she was indeed well aware of the potential consequences which could have been rendered unto her.

An image of her brother’s smug smiling superior face flashed in her mind, and she twitched visibly until the Counselor resumed speaking.

There wouldn’t be a formal report filed on the matter. Immediately, a sentiment of relief washed over the blonde Chief Surgeon as it meant that for the most part, her career was safe. For now at least. Of all the things which Kate worried about, her status as a Surgeon and a member of Starfleet was almost always of absolute paramount importance to her. However, as the next point came up, a mild notion of annoyance accompanied it, as in her mind, moving ‘her’ quarters was in a way a capitulation to her brother. A point on his side of their proverbial sibling scoreboard. Once more, that image of his face flashed in her brain, and sent neurons of anger and pettiness ablaze. Clenching her fist, she felt the instinctual urge to punch him again, and imagined that if he were here, she would have. “Why should I change my quarters? He invaded my space! He provoked me! Shouldn’t he be the one asked to move?!” Realizing how a sudden surge of temperamental emotion had gotten the better of her, and in fact caused her to act like a child on the matter, she felt a wellspring of frustration surge within her chest.

“Ugh!” standing from where she’d been seated, she brought her hands to either side of her head as she began pacing about the small room, trying to get a grip of herself. Taking a moment, she replayed the rest of what the Counselor had said, running her hands through her blonde hair as a matter of habit, and coping. “I’m sorry.” She apologized for the outburst, clasping those hands in front of her nervously as she tentatively approached the seat before Hathev’s desk, only to once more settle down into it. This was all so unfair. Yet again, she was being asked to change to accommodate her brother. Her behavior was being ‘corrected’ while his would go on uncontested. He was winning again. He always won. The sense of defeat she had been feeling earlier returned once more, though of a far greater magnitude and Kate felt all of the indignant rage and energy drain almost immediately. Remaining silent, she began to disassociate from the situation and her surroundings, her eyes eventually trailing away from the Commander, returning to examine the spinning Starfleet delta behind her head.

“I understand.” She muttered softly, barely even having registered the last few words that had been imparted to her. “I’ll speak with the quarter master and ask to have my quarters moved.” The tone in her voice reminiscent of a child who had been yelled at by a correcting parent, and who was painfully aware of how their sibling had yet again managed to weasel his way out of the same level of disciplinary correction, as was traditional for the favored son.

Clearing her throat first, she tried to keep from being compromised by emotions a second time.

Re: CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

Reply #8 –
[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor's Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn: @Swift , @stardust 

Hathev could certainly understand Ms. Foster’s frustration and even anger.  Her sense of being victimized by her brother was apparent enough to anyone in the room that it did not require a telepath or even an empath to understand.  But in this case, her empathic abilities picked up on far more than just the frustration and anger that sat on the surface of her thoughts. 

Fear poured off her like radiation off a star.  It ebbed and flowed with the conversation, but as it did Hathev could compare it to the words being spoken, correlate it and, using that draw reasonable conclusions as to the motivation of such emotions.  She feared for herself, her career.  She feared her brother, not for him in the way a loved one worries about another, but rather a fear of him in not just the antagonistic manner one might expect of two siblings, but rather a hostile, victimized sense of fear. 

That fear ebbed only slightly, as relief settled in when Hathev had advised she would not be making a formal report.  But even that relief did not staunch the fear and anger she had for her brother which flared up at the suggestion she move her quarters.  These emotions were too intense, too genuine to come from someone who delighted in being a ‘troublemaker’ and unless Ms. Foster were sociopathic, of which she had seen no evidence whatsoever, they had to be genuine.

But something else had threaded its way into conscious emotions… distrust.  Distrust leveled towards Hathev.  No… not Hathev, at least not directly.  No… distrust leveled towards counselors.

Ms. Foster had been ordered into counseling in the past and thusly it seemed reasonable to conclude those sessions had been less than successful.

“Your apologies are unnecessary, Lieutenant.  Truly.  I can empathize with your perspective.  You feel that even though you are guilty of striking a fellow crewmate,” she refrained from using the word ‘brother’, for not at least.  It was important to dissociate her point from the familial connection, “you were provoked and victimized.  Therefore, you do not feel it should be on you to move.  I can understand that sentiment.  However, the fact remains that, despite provocation, you *did* strike a fellow crewman and must be held to account for those actions.  In that regard, I would ask you to consider my suggestion that you re-locate your quarters as a condition of my offer to you to refrain from the formal report.”

She paused, momentarily unsure of how much to tell Ms. Foster about her meeting with Mr. Foster back on Aldea.  While it was not strictly under a doctor patient relationship, there was still a matter of professionalism she needed to respect.  However, sharing her own experience might allow Ms. Foster to be more receptive to the offer and to at least try to trust in her.

“I would also strongly, encourage you to consider my suggestion of counseling.  I will refrain from making that a condition.  That said I have had my own…” she paused, “encounters with Mr. Foster and am well aware of his nature.  I am also aware that you have had mandatory counseling before, and I can sense the distrust you have for people in my line of work.  I therefore can only assume those sessions were counterproductive.  I would offer you the following to help you make your decision about sitting in session with me.  First, I am not the counselors you have seen in the past and they are not me.  Second, I can sense the depth of your emotional reaction to this conversation and I believe it to be genuine.  I believe that, on some level, you truly fear your brother.  Finally, my goal would not be to ‘fix’ you or suggest you are wrong or that your perspective is incorrect.  Instead, my goal will be to give you an outlet with which you could, without judgement, speak to your feelings, and develop the tools and resources to better handle the stresses your brother puts on you.  I might, also be able to teach you techniques that could assist in blocking out unwanted telepathic contact.”

In truth, Hathev did not know if Stellan Foster had invaded Kate Foster’s mind, but given her own history with her subordinate, she suspected the chances were likely.

“As I said, I am well aware of his nature.”

Re: CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

Reply #9 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Chief Counselor's Office | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

Her tangerine-eyes averted, Kate was reticently ready to just add this interaction with the Commander to the long list of them wherein her side of the ongoing struggle between her and her brother had been dismissed as either petty or imagined. She awaited to once more be labeled as the lone guilty party, and yet again be left to feel as though Stellan was indeed acting with only the very best of intentions; that her concerns were unnecessary and unwarranted. She was even ready to steel herself in advance of hearing the familiar analysis, which would of course ascribe her emotional problems as being entirely self-induced. It was enough to drive anyone mad, and she imagined that sooner rather than later, it really would. What was worse than that though, was how it affected her ability to cope with the withdraw symptoms she was permanently saddled with due to her addiction. Intense stress, of which her relationship with Stellan amounted for most of, was triggering a marked increase in the unpleasant sensations she was dealing with. In fact, the night before, after the incident with Stellan had come to an abrupt end, she had spent an agonizing few hours utterly and completely harangued by them; her arms and legs aching as though she were riddled with arthritis, and her mind awash with painful memories and thoughts which wouldn’t leave her. She could similarly feel that deep ache within her joints starting to return as the Vulcan counselor sought to re-iterate her stance on Kate moving her accommodations.

Another addition to the list, she thought as the Vulcan continued with her explanation, and something about an offer.

Except, when Hathev’s pause broke, and she began to speak again, Kate’s eyes instinctively snapped back to appraise whether or not she had heard correct. If she had just been imagining what was being said, rather than it being a reality. But the words matched her lips as they moved. This wasn’t imagined after all. Someone had finally seen what Kate always had and could potentially understand how Stellan was affecting her. Someone had finally believed her. That sentiment alone had the cathartic effect of shutting down any unpleasant withdraw symptoms which had been elicited by the emotionally negative response she had been prepared to endure. Instead, an all-consuming notion of relief began to settle in, caused by an intense rush of endorphins as Kate felt vindication for the first time in her life; it was a rush which spread throughout her in an instant, and which soon overwhelmed her. She had hoped to appear stalwart by clenching her jaw tightly, but it was a futile attempt as soon enough a heavy stream of tears began running down her cheeks, and the blonde felt forced to bring a hand to her face in order to hide them from the Counselor’s view, afraid of how it would make her seem weak. Sniffling loudly as she buried her face from sight, Kate internally cursed herself for having broken down in the manner she had.

“Shit!” She exclaimed softly, frantically wiping her tears away, while also trying stop herself from producing any more of them.

Taking a moment to let it all be absorbed, and finally able to tear her sunken face away from the refuge of her hands, Kate peered at Hathev through bloodshot eyes, stiffened her jaw and cleared her throat. “I umm... I think that’s fine.” Not wanting to appear too hopeful about this arrangement that she was agreeing to, a defensive mechanism no doubt meant to protect hers from being let down if it indeed turned out to be too good to be true, Kate stood from her chair and ran a hand through her asymmetrical hair, tucking it back behind her right ear. “I mean. I’m willing to give it a chance.” She wasn’t sure if she truly trusted the Counselor as deeply as Hathev might have hoped for, but Kate was at least willing to give her the chance to make an effort of it. Thus far, she had already proven herself to be different than all of Kate’s previous Counselors, and as much as she’d hated to admit it, Kate understood how important counseling would be if she was going to get over the demons which were haunting her. There was something however, which troubled her about what Hathev had said, and which was possibly at the root of problems that Kate was dealing with. For as aware as she was of how Stellan was abusing her, and had been for most of their life, she could never escape an explicit belief she harbored, and had prevented her from outright ending any association with him.

The belief that Stellan was also a victim, and that however screwed up his nature was, he did still want to ‘fix’ Kate.

“Listen. I know...” hesitating a moment, she weighed whether or not to admit what had crossed her mind. “...I know how fucked up this is going to sound. Like, I know how fucked up Stellan and I are. And I know that I... that I hate him.” She had verbally expressed her disdain for her brother many times, and while there was indeed an absolute truth to the feeling she was expressing now, it was still far more complicated and complex than just that. “But... I love him too.” Such an admission was very difficult for Kate to make, and it once again stirred to the surface a torrent of emotions which in turn elicited more tears that she briskly swiped away. “He’s my brother. I don’t 'want' to hurt him. I mean, I’m not exactly an innocent...” again averting her eyes as a strong notion of guilt welled up in the pit of her stomach, Kate began to approach the door. “...I’ve done some stupid, and some really awful things which... which probably deserve the kind of correction that he... that Stellan wants to make in me. But...” Stopping as she realized how much she was revealing, and how uncomfortable it was making her, Kate clasped her hands in front of her as she considered stepping through the door and bringing an end to this interaction.

“Umm.... never mind.” Already afraid that she’d revealed too much, Kate was hoping that Hathev might not press on the issue. She fidgeted in her stance a bit in front of the door and turned back to face the Vulcan before changing the tone of her voice to sound more relaxed, though internally she was far from it. “When... umm, when would you want to meet? As you’ve deman-- umm, I mean requested of me?” Trying to shut herself down, Kate was subconsciously working to convince herself that any kind of counseling with the Commander was simply a part of her proposal to avoid charges or official reprimand being made.

“I umm... have patients to attend to this morning.” It was absolutely an excuse to cut things off short, but it was still true.

Re: CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

Reply #10 –
[ Lt. Cmdr. Hathev | Chief Counselor's Office | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy] Attn: @Swift , @stardust

Hathev remained silent as Ms. Foster experienced her catharsis.  There was, of course, no need for her to apologize yet again, but at the same time Hathev saw no point in re-iterating the obvious.  Eventually Ms. Foster would come to that realization on her own…eventually.

"I am pleased to hear," she said when Kate admitted her willingness to give counseling another chance.

She listened again, somewhat surprised but at the same time understanding what she was saying about still loving her brother despite the bad blood between them.  She made a mental note to observe for signs of Stockholm Syndrome, but she remained silent.  She began to go on about her past and alluded to mistakes she had committed in the past before becoming self-conscious and stopping herself.  There was more there, Hathev knew, but it would be better to broach that topic at a later date.

"No one is perfect, Ms. Foster," she replied.  "We all have made mistakes in our life.  But no matter what those mistakes were, the only person who can decide you need to change as a result of them, is you.  Not Mr. Foster.  Not myself.  Not the Captain.  You."

She then listened to Kates question about when to start and her desire to return to her patients.

"As to that…"

She pushed way from her desk and inclined her head.

"Thea, open new patient file for Lieutenant Junior Grade Katelyn Foster and assign to me."

[File open]

"Thea, transfer audio transcript of this meeting into patient file for Lieutenant Katelyn Foster and note the time block in the general ship's record as a confidential counseling session."

[Transcript transferred.  Ship's log appended]

That created the patient file and moved the entire conversation into the realm of confidentiality.  The file would be restricted to her, of course but in this case that was not enough since the other counselors could use a medical override to access the file in the event that Hathev became incapacitated.  Under normal circumstances Hathev had no reason to suspect any foul play in that regard, but given that Mr. Foster was a member of her staff, it seemed prudent to take additional measures.

"Thea, add secondary security to Patient file for Katelyn Foster and deny Lieutenant Stellan Foster access.  Notify me immediately if any unauthorized access is attempted.  Require simultaneous dual factor authorization from both myself and Lieutenant Katelyn Foster to remove access restriction."

[Lockout established.  Notification parameters set.  Two factor authentication enabled]

That, she hoped would satisfy any concern Ms. Foster might have regarding her brother and her therapy.  If Stellen never attempted to access her file, there would be no harm.  But if he did, not only would he be stymied in his efforts, but Hathev would know about it.

She turned back to Kate.

"…we just did.  You may feel free to schedule your next appointment as your schedule permits, presumably after the current crisis has passed.  My schedule of availability is publicly accessible."

Re: CH02: S [D03|0655] Playing Parent

Reply #11 –
[ Lt. JG Kate Foster | Chief Counselor's Office | Main Sickbay | Deck 11 | Vector 02 | USS Theurgy ] Attn: @stardust @P.C. Haring

Gradually letting her gaze trail downward until it came to a focus of the carpeted decking beneath her, Kate was hastily attempting to rebuild the foundations of fortitude within the foremost spaces of her conscious mind. Just twenty-four hours earlier, she had existed in a somewhat stable frame of mind, at least as stable as someone with as many demons as she harbored was capable of; yet here she was, having been brought to tears for the second time in said period. All because of the same lingering issue which had been haunting her since she was a young girl and had first began to understand the wholly screwed manner of relationship which persisted between herself and her brother. For she both loved, and despised Stellan in earnest. There were times she’d wished he was entirely devoid of her life, just as there were times where she had found herself unable to even imagine living without his presence. All in spite of how aware she was that he had played a far more detrimental role in her upbringing than not. But there were still flickers here and there. Remnant images of a time before their sibling dynamic had irreversibly shifted to what it was now, and it was those few pleasant memories of when she was barely old enough to even remember, which she had refused to forget or ignore. No matter how much hurt he had caused unto her since, Kate couldn’t escape the idea that somewhere hidden inside of him, was still the eleven-year-old boy who had indeed cared for his sister the way an older brother should have.

Maybe if she’d have had any kind of a relationship with either of her younger sisters, Kate might have been able to latch onto them for familial support instead of how she so desperately longed for it from Stellan, but she knew that Taylor and Valanas were far better off without either of these two Fosters involved in their lives in any kind of a way.

Stellan and Kate were the hand-grenades of the family, and it was best if they were kept isolated where they could only harm each other.

Nodding as Hathev began to clarify where true change would come from, Kate still struggled to find the added wherewithal to tear her focus away from where it had settled on the floor below her feet. “I umm... I know.” She acknowledged, not because she had been told as much by previous Counselors, though they had definitely intimated such an explanation in the past, but rather because she knew it was an invariable truth. She had of course tried to convince herself over the course of the previous three years, since her last relapse into habitual drug abuse, that she was indeed changed. That her days of making bad decisions were truly behind her, and to an extent she did believe it, but there was absolutely a part nagging her in the back of her mind which taunted her constantly. It could have just been the part of her brain which had been re-written during her abuse of Felicium; the part which had left her permanently addicted to the narcotic, and prone to suffering withdraw symptoms for the remainder of her life. But it could also have been something far more sinister and which couldn’t have been so easily excused. Kate was utterly terrified of trying to understand the true nature of that part of her consciousness, because she feared that it was simply her at her basest level trying to be set free. That deep down, she wasn’t who she had aspired to be day-in, day-out, but that the actual Kate was the stupid, impulsive, and damaged girl who had fallen prey to drug addiction and who had let her younger sister drown because she was too damned high to intervene. That the real Kate was the idiotic surgeon who had endangered the lives of her patients by performing operations while under the influence, and who had committed other far worse crimes in order to continue her habit.

Her attention finally stolen away from where it had been, Kate turned to face the Vulcan Counselor as she assigned Kate and her situation to a file, then promptly locked it away from the potential prying eyes of her brother. The gesture may have been minor in technical significance, at least as far as she could tell, but it was a huge one in what it represented to her. It was helping to establish a layer of trust between Kate and Hathev, which in turn was helping the young surgeon to feel a little more comfortable with the idea of unraveling the myriad of problems swirling around in her head.

Maybe with Hathev’s help, she might have finally been able to get a grip on things.

“Thank you, Commander.” She swallowed, clasping her hands in front of her as she took a deep breath to try and repress the emotions that had welled up within her over the last few minutes. “I umm... I’ll get something scheduled as soon as I can. I promise.” Knowing that it was still a condition of the Commander’s offer to keep any official reprimands being filed, Kate meant to reassure her of a genuine intent to follow through in it. Spinning back away on her heels once more, Kate stepped toward the office doors until they opened, lingering just a moment to peer back at Hathev as if she were on the verge of saying something else, but instead the blonde stifled the sudden thought and left it unsaid as she exited. Composing herself, she tried not to dwell on any of what had occurred during her unscheduled meeting with the Chief Counselor, and the minor-revelations which had come as a result. No, she needed to be on top of her game as she was at the beginning of this day, aware of the challenges and difficulties which were potentially awaiting her. Yet, she would never truly be free of that constant worry over whether or not she would fall back into disrepair, resorting to old habits and once more becoming who she had been during long periods of her life. At least, not until she, with some guidance, learned to understand herself better than she ever had previously.

-FIN-
 
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