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DAY 06: Inner Space

DAY 06: Inner Space

Captain's Log, stardate 57505.33. Tomorrow, we will pass through the tachyon grid and board Starbase 84. We have carried the truth about Starfleet Command for over three months, and now, we will spread it across the entire galaxy. We have fought, suffered loss, and we have grieved. Through ashes and fire, mutiny and obscene horrors, we have endured... so that our call to arms might be heard.

Either way we look at it, Starbase 84 is nothing short of a suicide mission, and all of us won't survive the day. Therefore, I have asked the crew to give themselves an additional off-duty hour. I have made three holodecks available. They need escape. To clear their heads. They need time to write their last personal logs, and say farewell to their loved ones... or tell them that they will come home soon.

Their personal logs will be protected, uncompromised. They will be transmitted from Starbase 84 as a data package, carried with our message of truth. For if we won't escape the starbase after the transmission has been made, the surviving families and friends of this crew will learn what the lost wanted to say. It was argued that the logs might put families and loved ones at risk, that they would be persecuted or killed because of the transmission, yet our crew manifest is already known to the enemy. They already know who we are, and every shred of information the Federation had on us. Starfleet Intelligence has already screened us, our extended family and even our passing acquaintances. They have gone over our past to see where there might be breaches and leaks to our supposed allies: the Romulans. To our benefit, our next of kin are likely already targets by the media, so Starfleet can't touch them without being noticed.

Needless to say, if we would name our dearest and leave them messages, Starfleet Intelligence will likely screen the transmissions for usable intel, so I have asked the crew to not give away anything sensitive. As a precaution, Thea will also screen the messages while working in a temporary memory file, and after compromising intel has been censored to preserve the integrity of the mission, the temporary memory file will be deleted, which would leave the crew able to say what they want freely without Thea having access or recollection of the contents.

Yet more importantly, the personal transmissions won't make a difference given the nature of the whistle-blower simulcast. Our cry will make the personal messages pretty candles next to a rampant wildfire.
                                                                                                                      
- Captain Ives, Commanding Officer of the USS Theurgy


[ Lieutenant ThanIda zh'Wann | Quarters | Deck 05 ]

"Personal Log, stardate 57505.33," said Ida, looking out at the vista of space - a scowl creasing her brow as she thought of home and what she had left behind. She had just showered and let her skin air-dry, and as she did, she had decided to do as the Captain recommended, even if she had little to say. "Father... are you even still alive? Or will this message find its way to whoever leads the Keth now? My brothers, perhaps, Lor'Vela willing."

She took a deep breath and pushed away from the viewscreen. "No matter. I have one thing I need to say, and I hope you hear it. By now you have heard of the Theurgy, and I won't say more about it, but as the end draws near, for good or ill... know this."

Ida took a deep breath, clenching her jaw. "I made my life my own, in spite of all you planned. And though I have a few minor regrets, my only true regret as I face what could be my death... is not facing you in the Ushaan."

Having said this with the vehemence she felt, Ida was content. She had nothing more to say. "Computer, end log."


[ Junior Lieutenant Evelyn Rawley | Fighter Assault Bay | Locker Room ]

"Personal Log, stardate 57505.33,"  said Rawley sitting in the Lone Wolves' locker room with her hands in the pockets of her Tac CONN hoddie. "Uncle... What a wild ride it has been. You've seen the stories no doubt, but ignore all that bloody rubbish. A pox on them all, aye?" Rawley grinned for a moment, thinking what Haldane might have said to defend the family name. "One day this will all blow over and you and I will hit the London streets together and show the world how the Rawelys and the Winterbournes have a drink. Or twelve of them. In fact, in my quarters, I have a bottle of real scotch. A fine year. When I get back we will share it, and I will tell all the war stories."

Rising to her feet, Rawley shut her locker, realising that she had to tell him what had happened. She didn't like to, but there was nothing to do about it. She had to work herself up to it. "I was laid up in a sickbay a couple of times, but don't you worry about that. They have me fit and fine, or nearly so, and I am back out there clearing the starlanes... keeping it safe for all you back home. I won't lie though... It has been a bit rough out there... but nothing I can't handle. You know us Rawleys... takes falling off a damn mountain to put us down."

Her parents had died that way, and she had fallen off a mountain too - survived a fucking avalanche. She chuckled and shook her head. "Fuck, my humour has gotten dark... It's how I cope though, you know that. You of all people know that."

There was no helping it. She dug her fingers around the handle to the locker and told the truth of it. "You see... We lost Cale the other day. Fuck but I don't know how to tell you any other way... I'm sorry." It still hurt. Damn, it hurt, but she was not about to start over making the bloody log. "You should have seen it though... He was a true hero, not a half-ass wannabe like me. He took this starship through it all.. and when it was about to be overtaken by mutineers, he bargained with his life to give it back to the Captain. Starfleet might brand him a traitor now, Federation media too, but damn what he did... Another time, another place, and medals would have rained on him."

Wiping her eyes irritably with her sleeve, she left the locker room. "One fucking day, when this is all over with... I will make sure he gets them. You'll see, Uncle."


[ Ensign Cir'Cie | Junior Officer Quarters | Deck 04 ]

"Personal Log, stardate 57505.33," said Cir'Cie, seated on the floor as she had finished meditating. She opened her eyes and looked into the shadows of the room. "Mother and Father, you will have seen the reports. I trust you will view them objectively, and piece together the truth of things. If not, it is my hope that the message from the Theurgy will reach you and you will be enlightened."

Slowly, she rose to her feet, her hands loose at her sides as she considered how things were in the family residence on Vulcan. "I do hope I have not inconvenienced mother's work too much. I would hate for an false disgrace on my part to damage her diplomatic dealings," she said, adjusting her robe as she stepped towards her small desk. "It was an odd confluence of events that led to me becoming stationed upon the Theurgy just a few short weeks before the Captain and crew were falsely accused. But I admit to feeling... a certain amount of discontent about the development. I am needed here, and have proven to be an asset to a crew in need, but my mental faculties have been compromised twice, and I still meditate to rationalise the separate events. I am certain that I will be able to compartmentalise the residual shame and guilt I have felt, and be prepared for the mission we will undertake tomorrow."

Cir'Cie sat down and opened her computer console - the light reflected in her passionless eyes. "Should things go fully awry, I would like to detail my more choice findings of late. First, we have the properties of the Carisae plant. I have found that when mixed with..."

OOC: All recordings of personal logs goes into this thread, and if you want to write threads about anything else your characters does on the day before the mission to SB84, with me or someone else in the group, you should post separate threads with this in the subject line:

DAY 06: Insert Title Of Scene [XXXX hrs.]

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #1 –
[ Eun Sae Ji | Below Decks | Deck 07 ]

"Personal log, stardate 57505.33." Eun Sae sat at one of the booths around the Theurgy's bar. She was quiet for a moment before she sighed running her hands through her hair as she struggled to find the words to say. "Cancel log..." Eun Sae muttered leaning back against the cushions of her chair closing her eyes. She took a deep breath before calling standing up and walking over to the bar. When she returned her arms were laden with multiple bottles of beer. Upon taking a seat she twisted the cap off her first bottle and began drinking.

In no time at all Eun Sae was low in her seat her fingers loosely wrapped around the neck of another bottle. A number of empty bottles sat beside her on the table "Geonbae." Eun Sae called before draining the rest of the bottle. Eun Sae placed the bottle back onto the table. She sank lower into her seat staring ahead before sighing once more letting her shoulders sag a bit. "Personal log, stardate 57...505.33." Eun Sae said this time however her words came out in her native tongue. "Omma...Appa...I miss you." Eun Sae said her speech paused again before she continued a few moments later. "You've probably heard by now...I'm a fugitive." She said biting her lip. "I can only imagine how dissapointed you must be with me..." She leaned forward folding her arms on the table and resting her chin upon them. "I won't try to convince you that what I'm doing is right...Because that would be a waste of time..." Eun Sae said closing her eyes.

"And I don't know how much of that I have left...." Eun Sae said closing her eyes. "So I'll use what time I do have left to tell you how much I love you all." Eun Sae said quietly. "Omma I miss coming home from school to see you making lunch...I remember how I used to clean my bowl and you'd always immediately refill it with rice, like without even a second wasted like Wham! More food!" Eun Sae said smiling. "You always used to say "Your too skinny you need to eat more or your boobs will stay small."" Eun Sae did her best impression of her mother a voice that appeared far higher and a bit more condescending than her own. "When I was younger I'd always be so full...Appa...You though sometimes I wonder if you had a blackhole for a stomach you'd just keep eating and eating." Eun Sae turned her head to rest her cheek upon her arms her smile never leaving her lips. "Me and Eun Chan would always bet to see if you'd ever be full." A small giggle escaped the small Korean woman "I'd always win..." She added.

Her arm stretched out to let her finger trace small circles on the table top. "She'd always get so mad...But it never lasted...By the end we'd be out using her money to get ice cream or something." Eun Sae said her smile widening as the memory touched upon her mind. "And then Han Kyul would get mad at us for not getting him anything." Eun Sae continued getting lost in reminiscence. "Did I ever tell you the time Han Kyul took me and Eun Chan to the beach? It was the first time you and Omma left us alone at home a bit after Han Kyul got his license." Eun Sae said.  "We drove him insane Eun Chan kept screaming at him whenever we went over the speed limit and I just remember messing with the radio switching stations every few seconds just to annoy him..." Eun Sae went silent for a moment. "Those were great times..." She said her smile falling away.

"I miss you all...And I wish I could have chosen differently...I wish I'd just taken some job close to home teaching Tae Kwon Do or something...I could visit home every day and Omma could spoil me like she always does...And Appa you and I could sit in-front of the TV and watch WTF matches and argue about who would be the winner while Han Kyul and Eun Chan take sides." Eun Sae said. "It's too late for that now though." She said sitting up resting her palms on the table. "I love you...All of you, I want you to know that if I don't get the chance to see you again. Omma, Appa, Kyul, Chan...I love you so much and no matter what you may think or what you hear nothing will ever change that." Eun Sae said, she was silent for a long moment before she nodded "Computer end log."

[Translations]
Geonbae: Cheers!
Omma: Mom (informal)
Appa: Dad (informal)

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #2 –
[ Amelya Duv | XO Quarters | Deck 02]

After a satisfying shower in the quarters of Carrigan, Amelya had dried herself off and applied some skin creme to her skin while she was alone for now. She dried her hair as good as she could before toweling it up and walking into the quarters freely, setting herself down on the bed. She thought about it for a moment before she eventually spoke up "Personal log, stardate 57505.33." She paused for a few seconds before she went on. "Mom, dad... It's been a while since I got in touch with you guys." she smiled and continued "But as you can probably guess things are a bit hectic aboard the ship here. I can't go into much detail right now and I hope the press attention or any unwanted attention in general. I hope you guys are doing well aboard SB3..." Amelya paused now as she looked around in the room. There were so many things that she wanted to say yet that she couldn't. 

"I'm not sure if this will be a farewell. By now you news will probably reach you of a major event. A cause to which we've been fighting for. It's a just cause." She felt tears welling up in her eyes "I wish I could see you two one last time, just to give you guys a hug and say things face to face." She wiped her eyes before continuing "Just... Just know that I've had a wonderful journey so far. I've met a lot of new people and some of them are truly special." She thought about Trent and wondered if they did survive through this if she should mention him to her parents.It was too soon to tell and thus she said her goodbye "I hope you two are proud of your daughter, I'm happy you guys taught me everything I needed. I could not wish for any better parents. I love you guys. In this life and the next." she said "Computer end log."

[ Simon Tovarek | CSO office | Deck 04 ]

While tinkering at what seemed to be a robotic structure Simon decided it was time for him to create his personal log. "Personal log, stardate 57505.33. I've found something interesting aboard a station. If I'm able to tinker with it a bit more and get the right materials or the right equipment for it.." he paused as he started to use one of his sticks to weld a piece together "I might ju.." a loud zap was heard and a small BLAM caused for a loud curse from the Russian scientist. His equipment got hurled through his office before he ended his tirade. "The project will be worked on when I'm more rested... Anyway as you can hear mother, all is fine with me. Despite what they might feed you, you always know that your little boy will do what is right and just. So do not weep for me when they announce that I'm deceased. Be proud mother... I want you to be proud of me."

He sat himself down on his chair as he looked over his office "Our trip across space has not been without peril... I've learned someone that I knew to love for a brief period of time. But alas fate decide that she had to be taken from me. I do not know why." A long pause followed before Tovarek sighed once more "Either way mother, I hope the truth will outlive what we started. It must, for if not.. All what we've accomplished will have been for naught."

Tovarek doubted if he should refer to his personal friend on the admiralty board. Perhaps he was in on this conspiracy, perhaps he had been killed already. He deemed it unwise to bring his mother into peril thus he decided to bring an end to his log "With this mother, I bid you goodbye. Not farewell for as you believe, we will meet on the next plain of existence." He knew his mother was somewhat religious. Calling it heaven would go too far for his scientific believes, yet he liked to tease his mother with those words, if it was for the last time even.

[ Edena Rez | Below Decks | Deck 07 ]

Edena looked at the people gathering in her lounge area. Still undecided whether or not to own the bar entirely. She sighed as she heard that people could make their own personal logs if they desired to. To be uploaded to the starbase upon arrival together with the hard truth. Edena smiled as people tried to soothe their thoughts and prepare for the inevitable battle. She doubted if she would create a log for herself or for anyone she might want to leave some last words to. Yet as more clients came in on her lounge she decided this was not the time nor the place to do so. In fact, she couldn't even come up with anyone else she'd want to leave a message to.

[ Cameron Henshaw | Conference Lounge | Deck 01 ]

Cameron was gazing out the windows at the conference lounge as she contemplated about her personal message that would be sent out when they would arrive at Star base 84. One of the people she wanted to convey a message to would be right on the scene. It would prove hard to change the mind of the man she called her father, hopefully he was ready enough to hear her out before the starbase squatted the Theurgy out of space like a pesky comet. She sighed as she wondered how her mother would be doing. Surely she must've been informed about her mutineer daughters, she could only start to imagine what sort of shame she must've felt. Not to mention how her father would be feeling.

"Personal log, stardate 57505.33." she said with a clear voice while her eyes gazed upon the stars in the distance. Would it be the last time that she could just peer into the distance like this? "Mom... Dad... By now the news of our travels must have reached the both of you. Dad perhaps sooner than you mom, but I'm sure he'll brief you about it when the time comes. I'm sending you both this message so that you both hear what my side of the story is. It's not that I'll spew out some crazy BS about what we've been through or spill anything that could jeopardize our mission at hand. I just hope you two can both understand that it was the right thing to do." she said with a calm voice while she folded her arms and took in a deep breath.

She started telling her parents about the risks her sister and she ran during this perilous voyage, not sharing anything sensitive to the mission or the ship, but still making herself crystal clear about what had happened. At some point she felt like she couldn't go any further "It was on Theta that..." she had to pause now as she felt her tears well up in her eyes "I lost Lisa on Theta... Saw her... She didn't have any pain..." she sobbed as she relived the moment of her sister being put down by the Reaver that had escaped the star ships and fighters. "She wanted to tell you two... She really loved you guys... She died in order to save as many as she could... She died for the ugly truth out there!" Cam shouted out now as she collapsed on her knees and cried.

It took her at least five or ten minutes before she could slowly calm herself a little, the sobs still audible on the file no doubt before she snorted and wiped her tears off. "Right now I'm on my way to you dad. I hope you can see what horrible truth we've discovered. I hope you can forgive me for losing Lisa... I'll cut it short here as I'll probably be a mess if I keep talking now. I love you both! Mom, dad... I love you both with all my heart. Computer.... End log." she spoke at last before she rested her back against the wall and buried her face in her hands, knowing she had to bolster herself for the inevitable confrontation with her father. At this point, that task seemed impossible as she slowly continued to cry, alone in the conference lounge.

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #3 –
[ Carrigan Trent | XO's Ready Room | Deck 01 ]

With the operation on Black Opal behind them and actually being on top of his workload and the ship's day to day operations so far, Trent had the time to sit down and start working on a single log entry that would be added to their message to the Federation at large. 

"Stardate 57505.33.  This is Carrigan Trent, currently acting Executive Officer, USS Theurgy.  This is not a personal log, nor is it a confession.  This is the truth of things, the facts as they happened. 

Until recently, I was the staff intelligence officer to Admiral Sankolov.  It was not long after I joined his staff that I started to notice a great deal of irregularities within Starfleet's intelligence channels.  Reports were over-classified, filed, forgotten, never passed on or straight up altered.  And every time, the effect of those failures have further destabilized the sector of space that was so concerned.  Good people have died.  That was when I started to dig deeper and deeper.  Nonsensical, or ethically grey orders were coming from Starfleet command, some of them blatantly illegal."

"And a good many of those came from Admiral Sankolov's own office.  And it became my believe that Starfleet Command had been compromised.  When Task Force Archeron was stood up, I accompanied Sankolov and while we were underway, I was ordered to create a weapon that would allow him to kill the entire crew of the Theurgy and take the ship intact without firing a single shot.  Instead, when the Task Force caught up with the Theurgy, I released a modified, less lethal version against the Task Force, then made sure there would not be anything left on board to rebuild that program."

"Captain Ives asked for terms of surrender, and Sankolov refused to offer any, even to stay within the bounds of Federation law.  But in the end, the confrontation ended with a minimum of casualties.  I know what you've heard, that it was done by the Romulans.  But if the Romulans had been involved, why would the Task Force have been left adrift; they would have been boarded and every scrap of Federation technology they didn't already know about would have been ripped out and taken away."

"Since I defected to Captain Ives, I was able to reclaim my pride, reclaim myself.  I became the man I'd once been again.  Remembered a great many things I had forgotten.  Now, I've started fighting the good fight again.  And if we die at Starbase 84, then at least our message, our voices, will be heard across space.  And hopefully someone else will take up the torch."

"Mother, Father, I know I disappointed you when I joined Starfleet, yet you still welcomed me home after my injuries.  I don't know what you've been told, or even if you've been told anything by now.  But what I'm doing, it is for the Federation.  I can't say all I've done was for the Federation, because for too long I allowed myself to just wallow in guilt and grief.  But no more."

"Our family's always had a tradition of service.  As bureaucrats, politicians and civil servants.  But I too, serve.  If in my own way."

"This is Commander Carrigan Trent, signing off.  Hopefully not for the last time."

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #4 –
[Ensign Chris "Husker" Slayton | Personal Quarters | USS Theurgy]

Chris was honestly at a loss as he looked at the terminal in front of him with a confused expression.

He knew that he had to send a message and let his family know that even though he was now considered to be a renegade that he was still alive and doing alright...but by that same token he didn't know what you were to say in this situation, how much could he say without saying too much...

"Aw hell." Chris finally said before he leaned back and said "Computer, begin personal message and add the current stardate."

+Confirmed, Recording+

Chris closed his eyes and just started speaking with "Hey everyone, it's Chris. I'm sorry that I haven't sent you all one of these messages yet and you can probably guess as to why and before Danny boy can make a snarky comment, yes I went rogue but with the right intentions." the man from Asgard then leaned forward in his chair. "There is something wrong right now with the Federation and Starfleet and it took me having to go rogue to see it and I'm not ashamed at my actions because I can honestly say that if dad was still alive he would curse me for what I've done but forgive me for my convictions which he always accused me of not having."

"The last time I sent you a message it was right before the Harbinger went rogue and I've since moved to the Theurgy after the loss of the  Harbinger and I know that Marc will want more details as to why but I'm not going to give them yet as it still has me more then a little bit shaken and compared to the appearance that I put on for my fellow officers and crew, doing what I did bothers me because of everything I did to protect and honor that ship...it boggles the mind at why I haven't put myself in the brig."

Chris chuckled at that comment before continuing. ""Speaking of the brig, I know how you feel about people who betray their uniform biggest brother of mine and I know that most of that comes from your time serving on the Malinche when the orders to hunt down that rogue officer almost cost you your life a few years back but this is different, Marcus, and I hope one day you'll see what I mean." Chris said before looking very serious into the screen. "Out of all of us, Marc, you're the only one that took the whole meaning of the uniform seriously and I tried to follow your example which lead me here, to serve under Captain Ives with Doctor Duv and Chief Sun from the Harbinger, but if I have to face off against you and the Challenger then you know that I won't be pulling any punches what's so ever."

Chris then got up from his chair and walked around to the back of it, his face betraying several different emotions at once as he moved. "Mom..I honestly don't know what to say that would help you understand what I'm doing but I need you of all people to understand that I intend to see this to the end, no matter what the cost." he said in a serious tone as he tried to keep his voice from breaking. "I love you all very much and I hope to see you again one day...but until then, please don't think ill of me until you see why I did what I did." as he continued his message...

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #5 –
[ Shall chXinya | Junior Officers Quarters | Deck 04 ]

Shall is standing in front of the window in his quarters, looking out at the space on the other side of the transparent aluminum.  Leaning against the material on his forearm, he relishes the feeling of a the cold metal.  Dangling from his hand is his shapla, the locket he and his bond mates gave to each other upon their betrothal all those cycles ago.  One of the few physical reminders of his shelthreth, his gaze turns to the cross and gender symbols and his mind's eye sees the braid made from their hair inside the locket.

Sighing, the Andorian turns from the window and loops the locket's chain around the framed picture of him and the other three.  "Thea, begin recording, personal message for Jay, Syora, and Tavin."  Looking down at his naked form, Shall starts narrating his letter home while dressing for the never-ending work on the Theurgy's sensor arrays.

"Hello everyone," Shall starts with a small sigh.  "Hopefully this gets to you, with my current status I wouldn't be surprised if it gets stopped somewhere.  I know I'm running quite late for our gathering at Therin Park, and I'm sorry for it, but it was unavoidable.  To say things have been crazy for the past few months.  I'm sure you've heard about us in the news, and I can only imagine what they are saying about us.  Typically for the news though, some of it is true, some of it false.  I wish I could tell you more about what has happened, but I can't, both for your protection and mine."

Now wearing most of his clothing (the jacket still needed to be zipped and his boots put on), Shall bent down to retrieve the former and barely caught himself from faceplanting the deck.  Only a last second arm save let him roll over to land on his rear with a still-audible thud.  "Ow...you probably heard that." He mutters to the recording.  "I guess I should explain, there was an incident a little while ago, and I was....injured.  Shrapnel caught me in the head, and took off...well, you know."  It was a good thing that he was only recording audio, as his cheeks were flushing a deeper blue at the thought of his injury.  "I'm not Whole, in any respect now." The chan finally admits, both to himself and to his bondmates.

"Jay, you've probably already gotten pressure to enact the Whole Vessel Law, and with what you've probably been told, I won't blame you if you decide to separate.  There is a very good chance that even if I survive the next few days, I may never be able to return home.  I can't plead a case here, not now.  But, Uzaveh willing, we will be together once again, Whole and complete.  Tavin, I've tried to keep up with my reading of the Codices, just as you scolded me to.  My faith may never be as deep as yours, but at least I'm starting to understand on a deeper level."

Recovering from his latest fall and now mostly together, Shall starts brushing his hair, frowning at the bandaged stump of an antenna in the mirror.  "Syora, little Syora...don't let Jay push you around too much."  His frown reversed when some memories of their time in the Northern Wastes came to mind.  "Let your pride be heard, there's no shame in hiding it."

Finished at last, the chan takes ahold of his shapla once again.  "I do need to ask something of you three, I may have no right to do so, but if you could, it would be of great comfort.  By the time you've received this message certain things should have come to light...things that extremes in the Visionist Party will latch onto in their propaganda.  My shi, Vanil, she's listened to them in the past.  Keep an eye on her, and if you can, try to stop her from doing something stupid.  Let her make her own mistakes if she's so adamant, but as long as she's willing to listen to reason, please, be my voice in her ear.  The Federation is too important to give up."

"Well, it's time for me to go to work.  You know how it is, too much to do, never enough time in the day.  Sometimes I envy the Denobulans, not needing to sleep for months at a time.  You all be safe, my love and thoughts are with you always."

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #6 –
[ Heather McMillan | Personal Quarters | USS Theurgy ]

[Show/Hide]

"Heather's personal log, uhm...stardate 57505.33?" said McMillan, her eyes looking to one side uncertainly as she had the computer run a record for her to send to her parents. She waved at no one in particular, her multi-coloured hair floating around her like cascading rivulets of light and patterns, "well, that's what they told me...uhm, hi dad, mum, uh...hope, hope everything's right as rain back home."

She patted her hair down, but that only launched the near-weightless strands even further up as they gently floated back down, taking its own sweet time. Blowing upwards at a strand that fell over her face, she launched it straight up and left it there as she continued with her message, not really sure where she was taking it, "So...well, first of our family to make it to the stars in absolute ages, yayyyy," she sort of threw her arms up a little, though it was more of a constipated shaking of the arms at shoulder level. Of course, by saying that she was the first of her family to make it to the stars, she actually meant the first Radiant to return to space in centuries. "Uhm...there's a lot of stuff being said, about the people on this ship, but you know me, right, mum? Dad? Can't hurt a fly and that sort of thing. Well...just...uhm...I love you both so much, and I'm really hoping I get to tell you that in person real soon. But just in case I don't...I never gave anything less than all that I could, and I never gave up our ways. My light will shine in the stars. Serve the tea and crumpets, if you please, for me, or to remember me."

Sighing she leaned back in her chair and said, "End recording. Kill lights."

The computer acquiesced to her requests, and in the darkness, McMillan began to shine brightly. She rested her palms on her lap, lowered her head, and basked in the enjoyment of shining like a beacon, without the risk of blinding people, since she was all alone.

All alone.

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #7 –
[Doctor Hayden O'Connor| Personal Quarters| USS Theurgy]

Entering her quarters for the first time in what seemed like a century, Hayden eyed her comm console warily. All she wanted to do was sleep for a week or 10, but she knew she'd been putting off recording a log to her family for far too long and if she didn't do it soon, she would lose the opportunity. If she should die during the mission, her family would have no choice but to believe what was being said about her and the rest of the crew of the Theurgy. Hell, now that she thought about it, they didn't even know she was no longer on the Harbinger.

She moved to sit in front of her console, but even before she said the words, "Computer, open personal log," she felt herself  become paralyzed with emotion. Hayden O'Connor came from a law-enforcement family who never left Earth and didn't understand anyone who did. Coming from a family of cops and a mother who worked as an ADA, it was hard enough for them to understand why she wanted to enter the gray area of psychology as opposed to the relatively black-and-white world of policing and law, let alone Starfleet. It wasn't an issue they were going to disown her over - they were too close for that - but it was still a sore spot within the family. Even though Hayden was clearly proud of her family's history in  law enforcement, during the worst of the disagreements, her father would accuse her of being a bit too elitist and perhaps more than a little ashamed of her blue-collar roots.

Of course, Hayden tried to counter that Starfleet was itself an honorable organization with a commitment to helping people and its own ethical code. Hayden was never sure she got through to her father, but she hoped in time, he would see it for himself...

Whatever hope there was for the future, she knew she couldn't stop her family from being told she was a traitor - now not just of her own family legacy, but also according to her chosen way of life. As she closed her eyes against her own burning tears, she could hear her father ranting in anger and see her mother quietly sobbing in the corner. Her brothers would probably be numb with their own rage and would instead focus their energy on comforting her mother.

Wiping away her angry tears, Hayden wondered what she could possibly say to change all that? Should she even try? When her tears subsided for the moment, O'Connor reminded herself that as intense as her family's emotions were, in time, in typical Italian and Irish fashion, they eventually subsided. Rage would eventually give way to intense sadness. The last thing she ever wanted to do, least of all her potential last act as a sentient being, was to make her parents cry. Whatever her legacy turned out to be, it damn sure wasn't going to be that.

And so, with a shuddering breath, she began, "if you believe nothing else of what I'm about to tell you, please believe I love you all, and despite what you may hear from others, no matter how seemingly trustworthy the source, I'm doing what I love.  If I should die, I did so for a cause I believe is just. Mom and Daddy, I never stopped being the woman you raised me to be... Andy, David, and Sydney, please don't let anything about me destroy the family you have built.  Whether you consider me a part of it or not any longer, I never took for granted the love and support I was given. Please lean on each other and know my decisions were my own and were not the result of anything you did, said or didn't do or say. I hope one day to see you all again, but if that day never comes, at least on earth, please know I was always proud of you and proud to carry your names in my heart."

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #8 –
[ Tessa May Lance | Junior Officer Quarters | Deck 07 | USS Theurgy ]

Alone in her quarters Tessa May Lance stripped off her uniform and put on her faux alligator skin coat, a high collared wide lapelled longcoat that was one of the few keepsakes she had of her life before onboard.  Wearing it gave her confidence and allowed her to pretend that she was the dashing young pilot who was on the fast track in a Starfleet that upheld Federation ideals and was incorruptible. 

She was engaging in another weekly exercise she used to stay sane, composing a letter to her loved ones, even though she hadn't tried to contact them ever since the Theurgy went on the run. 

"Hey Mom, Dad, it's me, Tessa," she called weakly.  "Just recording a message that I hope will reach you someday when this is all over.  We raided a supply depot this week, 'commandeered some supplies' is how Captain Ives might put it, and in the process we kind of destroyed it.

"It's not our fault!" Tessa protested.  "Really it isn't.  The Romulans showed up and attacked the supply depot while we were there!  No really!  They really did!  I know what the official report will say but the Romulans were there, honest!"

Her voice now showed some defiance, some of that warrior spirit that had become so elusive as of late.  "The new mark III Valkeries sent them packing!  It was one of the new warbirds they're using, Mogai-class I think.  Wow.  They'll spend a lot of time in R&D trying to find a way to upgrade 'em now!  And the best part was that we didn't take any--"

Tessa coughed to keep her voice from breaking.  "The thing is, we did take casualties.  Kestral, Ensign Skye Carver, she was shot down before the Romulans even showed up," she whined as her greenish gold eyes glistened and blinked back the tears.  "Remember my last letter, when I told you about the betrayal of the Harbinger and how their first officer took over people's minds and had us killing each other?  I think... Doctor Maya and the others must have missed one when it came to deprogramming 'em.   Iron-Fox took Maverick off the flight list and we haven't seen him since the weapons raid.  We... we heard he might be in the brig.  Oh God, as if this wasn't bad enough we're still killing each other!" 

The rest of her letter was largely incoherent.


[ Maya | Junior Officer Quarters | Deck 08 | USS Theurgy ]

Lieutenant (Junior Grade) Maya's quarters were several degrees higher than the norm for the rest of the Theurgy and the humidity level was slightly below average as well.  Despite the length of time it had been since she had visited her native planet, she always set the temperature and humidity level close to that of her home province in Vulcan's Eithnir Province before she meditated or went to sleep.  The heady scent of incense was strong right now, but Maya was not meditating, nor was she sleeping, although she was dressed in the silky robe of thin fabric she usually wore when it was time for bed.  Instead she was sitting cross-legged on her meditation mat staring at the PaDD she clutched in her long slender fingers.

Despite the illogical premise, Counselor O'Connor had told her that it would be therapeutic to compose a letter to her loved ones, even though it would never be sent, except perhaps posthumously.  Maya had pointed out that all of her blood relatives she had ever met were dead after over two centuries and that as a Vulcan she had never really experienced the emotion of 'love.'  O'Connor had countered by suggesting that she write to the few fellow survivors of the NX-04 Discovery.

Although it was unlikely that the exercise would be efficacious on a Vulcan, Maya had always been an advocate for alternative medicine and decided to honor the request and give the unorthodox treatment a try.  Hayden O'Connor wouldn't be able to help Maya if the little Vulcan didn't cooperate so she did what she asked.   After composing her thoughts she spoke, watching her words appear on the PaDD in front of her.

"To Lieutenant Jason Harn, USS Galaxy:

"Dear Jason, I hope this epistle finds you in adequate health to execute your duties.  As you may have heard the crew of the USS Theurgy have been declared outlaws and are being hunted for treason.  I assure you and Rhonda that we are not traitors in any way.  A species of intelligent parasites have taken control of the top leadership of Starfleet and are attempting to take over the Federation.  Their ultimate goal is to use us for chattel."

Maya paused.  Giving a warning that would never reach its recipient didn't seem cathartic in the least.  If anything it seemed destined to provoke a reaction that would upset her Vulcan discipline rather than reinforce it.  Perhaps talking about something more personal would be more efficacious.

"On a positive note, I have been given a promotion by Doctor Nicander and am now Lieutenant (junior grade).  I suppose that in reality this is hardly official since even in a best case scenario it is doubtful that I would be allowed to remain in Starfleet, assuming that we are victorious and that Starfleet still exists when this is over."

That wasn't helpful in the slightest.  Perhaps rather than attempting to maintain her Vulcan calm the point of the exercise was to upset it.  Maybe this type of therapy was to supposed to relax her mesiofrontal cortex and release her emotions so she could perform an accurate self-diagnostic.  For a Vulcan, a psychological problem would manifest as a physical one, so it was important to expunge any negative emotions hidden in her psyche before she suffered a stroke or developed Shulok's disease.

"The last few weeks have been particularly disturbing," she admitted.  "We encountered a starship that had discovered the truth about Starfleet just as we had but it was commanded by a genetic augment that had somehow managed to infiltrate Starfleet.  Worse yet, he had somehow seduced his first officer, a Master Kolinahr Acolyte into... what is the term?   Brain cleansing?   Into rewriting the minds of the officers and crew of both the Theurgy and the Harbinger to ensure their compliance with a eugenics experiment of questionable feasibility.  This had the side effect of deadening the subjects' morality, effectively eliminating any sense of right and wrong.  I myself was the victim of a sexual assault, but I consider myself fortunate.  There were many senseless deaths, many at the hands of friends and shipmates.  The conduct of Captain Vasser and Commander T'Rena only legitimizes the false accusations against the officers of the Theurgy."

Interesting.  She actually felt something there.  Despite the unpleasant sensation there was a sense of satisfaction.  Perhaps a sense of justification was what she was truly looking for, a chance to express her view whether it was right or wrong.  There was no point in being objective; this was a time to get her biases in the open where they could be addressed.

"I have recently been the victim of a sexual assault," she announced stiffly.  "Lieutenant Commander Phanatos Kilinvoss rejected my overtures of friendship and forced himself upon me.  Due to the residual conditioning from my years as a sexual surrogate I was helpless against him.  This was not an isolated incident, apparently Commander T'Rena had unresolved issues that left many of her victims with no sexual boundaries.  Commander Kilinvoss, however, was not a victim of T'Rena's mental tampering.  He was a rapist and a murderer of his own free will."

She paused again as she contemplated the stirrings of her Vulcan passions.  Her mesiofrontal cortex instinctively repressed the emotion and Maya had to concentrate to relax it enough to allow her to feel the anger below her cool surface.  She had not intended to ever reveal that Kilinvoss wasn't one of T'Rena's victims.  It would dishonor a man who had given his soul to defend the Federation.  Despite being a savage throwback who was in conflict with Federation principles, he had also been a necessary evil to defend the Federation against the Cardassians, the Borg, and the Dominion. 

She frowned as she demurely blinked away the tears before she continued.  "He was also a brave and honorable man who would have fought to defend the Federation with his last breath if he had been assigned the correct commanding officer," she continued.  "Like all sentient beings he was a man of contradictions."

She had originally intended to discuss the effect her memories had upon Lahkesis Saugn but with her mesiofrontal cortex relaxed it was just too painful.  Perhaps it was time to quit this mode of therapy and begin her nightly meditation. 

"Computer, stop recording."


[ MCPO William Robert O'Connell | Senior Enlisted Quarters | Deck 15 | USS Theurgy  ]  

O'Connell shared his quarters with another chief but with the schedules spreading the skeleton crew out so thin it was like rooming with a ghost; there were signs of another being's presence but you never saw anyone.  It was like having the room to himself.

"Personal Log, Stardate 57505.33, Master Chief William Robert O'Connell reporting," he said as he sat in front of a cluttered desk nursing a cup of hot coca while staring at a screen.  "Rihen Neyah seems as innocent as a newborn lamb, but t' my way of thinkin' anybody who finds this record ought 'a take that with a grain a' salt.  That woman seems t' radiate a sexuality that seems as wholesome and pure as new fallen snow, and turn a fella's mind t' taffy toot sweet."

"Stop recording," he grunted as he wiped his mouth and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.  Ever since the destruction of the Horatio back in 41754 he had kept a daily log recording his investigation of the conspiracy that had killed everyone aboard.  Now that a conspiracy really had presented itself, he was no longer that paranoid fellow who thought that there was a plot to take over Starfleet and the Federation; now he was the informed fellow who knew it for a fact.  He really didn't have anything pertinent to add to his documentation of lies and conspiracies today though.  Throwing suspicion on Rihen the ravishing Risian was grasping at straws.  It was unlikely she was an infiltrator or up to anything more sinister than trying to find a place where she belonged.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.  "Computer, begin new recording," he sighed.  "Dear Mom.  It's Billy Bob.  I know that Pa always said I'd never make somethin' a' m'self and I'd come to a bad end and he was half right.  Things are lookin' jest like they did afore ah left Nimbus III.  I really was branded an outlaw jest like he predicted an' it's only a matter o' time afore th' law catches up an' hangs me from the nearest tree."

His next words held a note of defiance.  "But at least y' cain't say I didn't amount t' nothin'!  Guess who the chief engineer of the USS Theurgy is these days!  I''ll give yuh three guesses, an' the first two don't count.  Yup.  It's me.  Master Chief William Robert O'Connell, the only one ambulatory who knows this ship like the back of mah hand.  Desperate times call fur desperate measures, an' outta all the qualified engineers I'm th' one who's the most alive!"

He chuckled bitterly at his bad joke before wiping the sweat off his upper lip and staring at the computer screen in concern.  "Lotta new faces aboard now," he admitted.  "Everywhere we go we pick up some lost souls who'd git murdered t' by the enemy t' keep their mouths shut iffin we left 'em.  Lotta new faces, and lotta old ones gone.  We've been through four, belay that, five chief engineers now; three are in stasis and two of 'em's dead!  There's a pool in the engineerin' department a guessin' how long I'll last."  He could have mentioned Nolak Kalmil's recovery but he didn't.  He was afraid that he'd jinx the Deltan and have him die of medical complications before he even reported to duty.

"Ah know what you're thinkin', assumin' yuh believe me and I'm not jest lyin' t' save face," he continued.  "Yer wonderin' if I'm still paranoid or iffin' I've calmed down a mite, now that all my suspicions have been proven correct. Well I calculate it's gonna be quite a spell afore ah stop bein' paranoid.  As I mentioned in mah last letter, the crew of the Harbinger betrayed us, plain an' simple, proving that the enemy of yer enemy isn't necessarily yer friend."

He scratched his chin before he continued.  "Well since I'm th' chief engineer these days, I'm fixin' t' keep the Theurgy flyin' through the black as long as I can.  Say your prayers for me Ma, and if by some miracle you git this letter vamoose and make yourself scarce as best yer able.  I gotta admit, I'm plenty scared, but the only chicken on this ship is on the barbeque.  As it says on the plaque on th' bridge, courage is fear after it's said its prayers."

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #9 –
[ Sten Covington |  Chief of the Deck's Office | Deck 15 | USS Theurgy ]

Sitting in front of his terminal, Theurgy's Cheif of the Deck ran a hand through his hair as he regarded the terminal before him.  On the screen, the words 'ready for recording' were glaring at him as he wondered what to say.  He knew he didn't really have to make this log entry for the broadcast that was the Captain's brainchild.  But this might be his last chance to get word out.  And to speak to his estranged ex-wife and his now grown children one last time.

And then, his callused hand reached out and hit the control that would begin the recording.

"I don't know who this will get to.  But regardless, make sure that a copy of this gets to Jacqueline Everton and Margaret and Erik Covington.  Consider this one of my last requests, in case our next operation turns out to be my last."

"Theurgy was supposed to be a simple shakedown assignment, just like so many of them before that took me away from home so damn often.  But you heard at least part of what happened while we were out there.  The negotiations failed, and for reasons you can't possibly really know, the Captain had us defy Starfleet Command and took us out of Earth orbit.  First of all, we're not traitors to the Federation, regardless of what you all might have heard.  There's something wrong going on, the Captain believes it, and I believe her.  And you all know me well enough: when's the last one anyone managed to bullshit me?"

A harsh chuckle escaped his lips.

"Look, I won't bore you with all the details.  Besides, if I hadn't been living through this myself I'd think it would be the stuff of a bad and over-ambitious holonovel.  But there's something that stands out.  We recovered some kind of an advanced fighter from the future.  I know, it sounds insane.  But turns out someone out there doesn't give much of a damn about the Temporal Prime Directive.  Anyhow, you know how much I love civilian contractors.  Overbearing, entitled, think that us in Starfleet who aren't officers have IQ that might be almost as high as our shoe size.  We had one on board, a transfer from the Harbinger.  She was supposed to go over it, fix it up and do a full analysis on it.  Turns out she was murdered by some sadistic fuck of a pilot, and he got what had been coming to him; I'm only sorry I wasn't the one to give it to him.  Anyhow, if you ever see this, once the wreckage cools you might hear about that thing, eventually. 

In her memory, I got that thing ready to fly and fight.  Even named her, after that pain in the ass Boslic who wasn't nearly as bad as I'd first thought. 

Your old man's always been a wrench-turner.  I know, not as glamorous as being a Chief Engineer or a project director, but that's what I do and I do it well.  And I love it, always have.  To the point I let it get in between you three and me.  Jackie, I can't really blame you for what you did, even if it ripped me apart inside.  Maggie, Erik, there's always been something I loved more than being elbows-deep in some spacecraft and it's been the two of you.

And now, well, odds are you've had Starfleet Security and Intelligence sit you down, tell you how much of a traitor I am and ask you all sorts of questions you couldn't really answer.  I just hope you've inherited my sense for detecting bullshit and you never really believed any of that crap.  But if this is going to be the end, just know I'm going down doing what I do best.

And I don't know if I ever told you this, but you're the reason I do it.  Training those kids at the Academy, and Chiefs to run decks, and the long hours in the R&D shops and the trips to get things running and the shakedowns and now keeping birds in space when all of Starfleet's trying to kill us, it's all for you.  So you two, and your kids, have a nice safe Federation to live in.  I know, it won't give you back the birthdays and Christmases and school do's I missed over the years.  But it's what I did best.  It's what I do best.  And if I didn't do it, then I don't think I could look at myself in a mirror and tell myself I did everything I could for my family.

I love you."

And then, his powerful hand came up and ended that recording, before rubbing his face with palms like leather.  And in the privacy of his office, with the door securely locked, he screwed his eyes shut over the tears that clouded them.

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #10 –
Selena Ravenholm | Personal Quarters

The young woman sighed as she looked down at the PADD before her.  There wasn't much she could think of to say.  Her parents had been dead for a while and there were few relatives she had kept in any form of touch with.  Really the only family she had were her steady contacts within the FNN.  She guessed if she wanted to send someone something it may as well be them, and it might as well be what they would expect of her, what might possibly be her final report from the field.

"To the editors at the FNN:

           It has been a while since I have sent a story to your desks, but if I never had one before certainly I do now.  I am currently writing to you from my personal quarters on a ship of officers and crew branded as traitors to the Federation, the--by now I imagine rather infamous--U.S.S. Theurgy. 

           In regards to my previous assignment I can verify a few things: One there was a dark specter within The Harbinger captain, Vasser's, past.  Or rather I should say a dark specter in his birth itself.  As you may have already heard from Starflet's official sources while trying to track down the Theurgy him and the crew of his ship were branded as traitors with the reason being suspicions regarding his rise to the rank of Captain.  I unfortunately have the duty of verifying these particular claims as it appears that he resorted to among other things: cunning, blackmail, and even murder in order to rise to this rank.  More importantly though is what I was sent to investigate, the reasons for these suspicious omissions to his childhood, are due to the fact that he was born an augment.  In terms of genetic modification there has probably not been an augment of this scale since the Eugenics Wars  and I would even go so far as to say he could easily be compared to a second coming of Khan Noonien Singh.

As for how I came to be on the Theurgy, recently the two ships came upon each other through random chance and Captain Vasser decided that given his "superior genetic makeup" he should seize control of both ships.  In doing so he promoted himself to Commodore, with the help of his XO--a Vulcan acolyte adept in the use of a mind meld for the purpose of brainwashing. 

In the end Vasser was killed by a member of the Theurgy's crew, while attempting to commandeer the captain's yacht via holding the XO hostage.  With his death and a still hard fight, the crew of the Theurgy were able to finally take back their home. 

Unfortunately, as can be imagined many lives were lost and during the reign of Vasser the crew of the Theurgy suffered many atrocities, but immediately following the retaking of the Theurgy I witnessed a shocking example of the ideals of the Federation being shown even in the worst of times.  Despite the risk of potentially being spotted by the fleet that chases them, Captain Jien Ives ordered the launch of his personal yacht to rescue survivors of the Harbinger who evacuated their ship during the battle.  Once the crew was onboard the Theurgy they were reunited with the other members of their crew and were welcomed aboard the Theurgy as officers and crew.  They along with all members of the Harbinger's crew were pardoned of all crimes committed during the takeover due to said crimes being committed while under the brainwashing effects of a mind meld.  In addition the Harbinger's crew was welcomed into the fold and are now full-fledged members of the U.S.S. Theurgy with the full privileges of their previous rank on the Harbinger.

As you may have heard there are rumors that the Theurgy aided in the Romulan assault of a Federation instillation near the neutral zone.  The truth is the Theurgy did in fact begin an operation to raid said instillation in order to restock essential supplies.  In doing so the Theurgy utilized every strategy possible to minimize Federation casualties.  The operation was a success for the crew of the Theurgy and they faced minimal casualties.  While taking on the supplies a Romulan vessel decloaked and attempted a raid on the outpost and at their own risk the Theurgy's fighter squadron immediately engaged the Romulan vessel while the Theurgy took up a position to shield the instillation from Romulan weapons.  Members of the Theurgy crew immediately placed a priority on safeguarding the lives of members of the instillation's crew engaging Romulan boarders in close quarters combat.  Through the efforts of the Theurgy's crew the instillation's casualties were less than 5%.  Due to the escape of the Romulan vessel   (to preserve continued diplomatic relations with the RSE) it was decided by Captain Ives and the Instillation's Commander that the only solution was to initiate the base's self-destruct and transfer all crew to the Theurgy. Upon being shown what evidence Ives had that validated his disobedient actions the instillation's crew joined the ranks of the Theurgy's crew.

This crew and their captain, whom I have spoken to personally on several occasions, have endured.  Despite the many atrocities and trials they have faced, despite being branded as traitors, and despite the loss of numerous family and friends, they have remained true to the ideals of the Federation and when this message reaches you I imagine many of them, if not all including myself, will have died trying to do their best to get a horrible truth out to the people not only of the Federation but of the whole of the alpha quadrant.

In what may be my final report this is Selena Ravenholm and if I leave this reality I would like my last reported words to be: "May we the reporters and the press always stay the vanguards of truth."


Aisha S'Iti | Personal Quarters

The Cardassian had very little family left.  Her entire adopted family had been slaughtered with the combined Dominion and Cardassian assault on the DMZ.  She had been thinking for a while about who she would even consider sending her message to but then she remembered the one location where more of her former comrades were than anywhere else.  The only friend she could think to contact was a Federation captain leading the crew of a ship that had endured more than most could imagine.  He was once a captain in the Maquis.  He was now the captain of the U.S.S. Voyager.  His name was Chakotay

"It has been long since we talked, Captain.  It's been an even longer time since we each commanded sister ships in our shared resistance.  I guess it is a bit fitting that mine now sits in the museum as an exhibit of the one you once commanded.  I guess it is fate that the one called Jean would in his own way outlive Fantine after all.  Unlike yourself, I once again am branded an outlaw gone rogue from Starfleet command.  Sadly my previous post, The Harbinger was lost, but now I am onboard the most wanted ship in the Federation, The U.S.S. Theurgy.  There's times I am envious of you getting a command again but there are things that make up for how far you now outrank me.  Don't worry though I'm catching up, Ives just made me a Lieutennant and I'm Conn chief now.  Don't know if the rank will stick if we make it through this mess but once the truth gets out about why Ives disobeyed orders if there is any sense left in this insane galaxy then my captain will be hailed as a hero rather than the terrorist we are labeled as.  I am sure that you and your crew on the Voyager have standing orders to fire on my home ship without mercy until we are utterly destroyed.

You probably think my captain a monster for the numerous vessels we have destroyed to survive.  Please understand that what we do is not to harm but to safeguard the Federation, to preserve the ethics that we all fight to protect.  I do not know if I will live or die on my next mission, we never know really but Thea... she's a good ship and her crew are among the best.  Serving among the best is something I imagine you know very well though and surviving through every imaginable hardship well that seems to be something you and that crew of yours are some of the best at. 

Still, please, know that I fought to get the truth out to everyone.  The mission we are about to begin like many is dangerous, but this one.  It's probably suicidal.  But if the truth we hold can reach the rest of the Federation, well then the lives and this ship are a small price to pay. 

Please, if I could ask anything of you I would ask that you above all else protect your crew from the true monsters we try to expose.  I don't know if anywhere is safe. They, the hidden enemy we are fighting to expose, are everywhere, they are among those in the highest ranks, and they may have already gotten to the Admiral.  Hopefully they haven't gotten to her or you.

Either way know that when my captain's claims come to light to please listen to them.  Don't just ignore them as the ravings of a lunatic or an outlaw.  You know me Chakotay.  You know I would have died fighting him if he were a tyrant or a murderer.  If he didn't damn good evidence that the enemy we fight is real I would have done what was necessary to end his madness in whatever way I had to.  So would have his crew.  We obey not because he is captain we serve alongside him because we have to get the truth out no matter how bad it is.
Please if we meet each other in the depths of space don't recklessly obey the orders of a corrupt command.  We are far from the traitors we have been made out to be."


Miles Renard | Personal Quarters

The Vulpinian deliberated over what he was going to write and for that matter who.  Both of his parents had died in the civil-war after all, not that such a thing was unusual near the end of it.  The Ferengi influence on weapons trade had escalated the civil strife from a low living casualty affair to one where lives were lost in previously unimaginable numbers.  It was this change in the tone of war that had caused him to shift from life on the front lines to one reinstructing veteran pilots on the finer points of Ariel combat. He had debated who if anyone he had outside their ship who he would even have a need to address a personal message to.  Finally an idea had struck him.  Though not a relative nor one he was a comrade in within the war there was one who shared within him a certain unique comradery. 
It was not lost on him that if their enemy had been seeking to infiltrate his own people that one of her stature would be an obvious target to infiltrate with.  Still he had to do what he could, his very people's lives and culture were at stake not unlike many others in this fight.

Walking to his nightstand he pressed a few buttons on the audio/visual recording device within the room and began to speak in his native tongue. 

"Hello, fellow pilot.  It's been a while since we've talked, after all we did go our separate ways, you became the leader of our shared peoples militaries and I went off and joined our allies' fleet as what may as well have been a mere pawn.  I'm sure my name being among those on Ives' traitor ship was a PR nightmare for you.  I assure you though what we committed by the books is treachery, I would not have agreed to continue fighting amongst this ship's crew without good reason.   I don't know what to say or what you could say to our people about my disgrace in the eyes of the Federation.  I don't know if everyone turned their backs against their son amongst the outsiders or if I have been defended by my people.  Not that it matters.

When you receive this it may already be too late for my life to matter.  Know that what I do is because it is the right thing to do and whatever the official news is, I and my fellow crew do so for the sake of everyone in the Federation and I do so especially for everyone in the Sovereignty.  As the commander of their fighter wing if we are to fall I will be surprised if I and my fellow pilots are not the first to do so.  You know the drill as well as I.  We fighter pilots always are the first ones rushing into the fire and there's nothing any Captain could ever do to stop any of us. 

On a lighter note these mark 3's put our old fighters to shame.  Anyways I guess that's pretty much it.  Hopefully we make it through this battle and the truth gets out.  Hopefully, this gets to the "you" I remember and not something merely inhabiting your body to mislead our people."

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #11 –
Nolak Kalmil | Sickbay

*Personal Log*

Stardate 57505, Woke up in sickbay a short while ago after what appeared to have been a two month deep sleep with a broken neck, burned arm, and dark memories I'm not sure are even mine. Under went surgery by my friend Doctor Lucan cin Nicander. Currently in the recovery ward, trying to piece together everything that's happened since my collapse in the turbolift hours after the Federation Ambush of .... damn forgot the bloody date. It should be in my medical logs. Anyways, I plan on leaving sickbay soon, with or without permission so this might be my final log entry, depending the outcome. If anything should happen to me, I wish the best to my ex-wife and child l abandoned so long ago on Delta IV, and kept secret even from myself. Life in Starfleet is just as cold and empty as the vast emptiness of space. End Log

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #12 –
Po2 Sithick| Quarters.


Sithick wondered who he could message for a long time. In all honesty the people he would call friends were all aboard this ship, they would be joining him tomorrow on the Alegient. He hadn't had enough time to really bond with any of the theurgy crew, and most would take a long time before they were comfortable in his presence. There was no reason he should feel the need to send a message to Goronar, and there was no one in the Klingon Empire, or Crime Syndicate he would ever feel the need to talk too.

There was one thing he had left unsaid however, and he had to question the intelligence of sending a message to them. Going over the few mission logs he could Sithick had been surprised to see a familiar name among the ships that The Theurgy had encountered. It certainly made the universe feel a lot smaller in the grand scheme of things.

Enemy or not, he felt an obligation to reach out, and it wasn't like he could feed the enemy information. He only knew the yacht he had been working on taking apart and putting back together over the last few days.

Personal Message Recorded via use of translation software.


Captain Lennai O'Langton. I'm not really sure what to say to you. It's been over two years, So I guess we should start from the beginning. It must have been terrifying for you. Not just the battle, or the fact that the El Dorado was crippled with no way to get back to the Federation, but to pull aboard that life boat expecting an ally who might have helped only to find a frozen Gorn inside of it.

I smelt it when your second in command shit his pants at the sight of me, I never said anything, I couldn't I didn't even speak your terrestrial language back then. You had no reason to trust me, but you must have seen something... I often wonder what it was you saw. Going back I don't think I made the best first impression, My relationship with the medical staff was always a little unfriendly after I woke up. They gave me the nickname Fucking Scary Murder Lizard, I suppose I should think of that as an insult, but honestly... I kind of loved it.

I never actually said this, but I wasn't fluent in Klingon when you found me. I understood it about as well as I could given that i had been taking orders from them for years, but I had no formal education before my time with the El Dorado. Gorn wasn't a language in the Federation Data,net and oddly no one thought of speaking an Orion based language to me, so the translator gave me one language I couldn't understand for another that I could hardly understand. Yet over time we learned to communicate. I wonder if you would have taken the same amount of time with another species, or if you were just extremely curious to study one of my kind up close.

Still I remember the look of shock when I begged not to be returned to the Empire. I don't think you realized I had tear ducts, in truth I had never used them before. So we were both surprised when I cried that day. Your crew may have been terrified of me, some of the medical staff (Ensign Portly especially) Had taken to using a stick with a tricorder taped onto it rather then actually getting close to me for scans. Still it was the first time I could say that I had been handled with any respect, and before I knew what was happening it was going to be over.

So I begged, and cried, and fell to your feet, and you could have handed me over. It would have been the easy thing to do. I was the property of the Empire, bought from the Orion's as a slave to maintain their ships, a lesser captain would have seen me as little more then another empires property and a foot note in their logs.

You did not, by enrolling me in those classes, by learning I was smart and knowing where to apply me you gave me everything. The day I first wore this uniform was the proudest moment in my life, and the day you promoted me to Petty Officer 1st class was the day I had a family. I never had a birth day, or anything like that, but in the years to come I would look back on the day that you enducted me into your crew as the day that my life began.

I worked hard aboard your ship. The Federation became my Brood, something that I could have only dreamed of before. When I transferred to Black Opal, it wasn't my choice. If I had gotten my choice it would been to stay at your side. But the Opal was where I was needed, and as you were bound back for the Klingon boarder having me at your side would have lead to some sort of incident i'm sure.

I made Petty Officer Second Class, another proud milestone in my life. I have this little dream (You know I get those now? It was a huge point of contention back when I was dealing with Councilor Torell she was always asking me what I wanted, or what my dreams were I never had an answer for her before.) Where I could one day be a chief engineer aboard one of these metal boxes. I'm sure others are more qualified but that's why they call it a dream. I have worked hard to fit in with the Federation's ideals, I am living proof of what happens when a captain is at their best.

By now you have probably heard that the Theurgy destroyed the Black Opal. You will have been told that there were no survivors. I wonder did you think about me when you got that news? It's a selfish thought but I like to think you at least wondered where I was if I had been killed. Just as I wondered if you had been when I heard that you engaged the Theurgy.

The Crew of the Black Opal survived, We have been taken aboard the Theurgy not as prisoners. The information that will come out before you recieve this message, is true. I have seen it with my own eyes. The entire crew of the Theurgy has come to believe that there is an enemy hiding among the crew and command of Starfleet. My instinct tells me that you are not one of the enemy, because if you were you would never have shown me the kindness that you did.

The Federation needs more Captains like you, like commander Dewitt, and Like Ives the first time I met him he gave me only a curious glance. So used to being judged, he was perhaps as accepting as you. Which is rare among other humanoids.

I have lived my life to attempt to make you proud of your choice to let me into the Federation. It breaks me to think that we could be enemies tomorrow. That I could go up against any member of the Federation is saddening. Their is a bigger threat to us all, and while I love you for all that you did for me I have to follow them. What these parasites do, it's so much worse then what the Orion's did to me, and the Gorn. It's worse then any beating I suffered through at the hands of the Klingons. Their are no words for the kind of pain that these things have the capability to inflict.

I believe you gave me a chance because of the ideals that the Federation instilled into you. If you are still true to yourself, and true to those ideals, know that their is a shadow out in the universe that seeks to end them. If you still have compassion for the Gorn you set free, when the message goes out and the cry for help comes, please do what ever you can. And if our ships do one day engage in battle...

Know I do what I do in service to the Federation that freed me, and the women who trusted me not to kill and eat her crew against the judgement of her first officer. Know I am with them because I am following my dreams, and the ideals you taught me, so please trust yourself to do the same.

Yours eternal

Petty Officer Second Class Fucking Scary Murder Lizard.

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #13 –
[Jaya Thorne |  Quarters

This was it.  The morning was only a few hours away.  Jaya sat on her bed, running the information through her head one last time.  This was her chance to reflect and perhaps record a message for someone dear to her.  But who was left?  Mom was dead, her other family members hated her and she had no friends on Deneva.  Her closest companions were the crew of the Black Opal, and they would be with her tomorrow.  Even Sithick.  As much as she hated him and the constant threat he represented, her life would feel strange without his watchful yellow eye in it.  How ironic that she was finally doing something of importance, something that she loved, and she might die because of it.  The sad part was that she couldn't think of one single person to whom her life mattered, outside of her crew.

Jaya slumped onto her bed and glanced at her nightstand.  Three small figurines decorated it; three Federation class vessels each about 3 inches in height dangled from a hook that was connected to a square base.  It made the ships look like they were flying, or at least suspended in space.  Like they should look if you were to meet them somewhere out here in among the stars.  Jaya's collection was still safely packed away just in case this arrangement on the Theurgy proved to be less than permanent.  No, these ships were gifts for the one man that Jaya always had on her mind.  The man whom she'd lost contact with since being stationed on the Black Opal.  She'd sent letters and transmissions, but she'd never gotten a reply.  It was quite a shock when the presents stopped appearing.  Every 6 months or so, like clockwork, for as long as she could remember there would be a new ship figurine for her.  28 years of periodic presents from an absent father who worked too much, and then suddenly nothing.  It had been three years since her last gift mysteriously appeared.  Maybe she should..

Jaya sat up and moved to her datapad.  She'd tried countless times before, but maybe this time it would reach him.  Maybe this time she'd get a response.  Even if it was the one she'd already resigned herself to hear.

Begin Recording

"Hey dad.  It's me, Jay Bird. ... I, uh, got something for you.  Three Federation class models, like the ones you used to send me.  They're newer models.  I picked them up at the shop on my station.  Not too many novelties there, though, so I just got whatever they had.  Guess I was lucky cuz they only stocked three different types and I got one of each before.. it was.. destroyed..  I.."

Pause

Jaya closed her eyes and huffed an exhaled breath from her lungs.  She tipped her neck forward and let her long, chestnut hair fall over her eyes.  What would she want to tell her father if he were right there in front of her?  Pricks of tears formed in the corners of her eyes and she quickly sniffled and shook her head to clear them.

Resume Recording

"Dad, I know you'll probably never see this message because.. you're probably already dead.  I mean, that's why I haven't heard from you in three years, right?  I know it can be hard to send transmissions through space, but you always found a way to send the ships.  But when they stopped.. and I hadn't heard anything from you.. well, I'm not as dumb as people think I am.  I miss you.  I miss mom too.  I wish there had been a way for all of us to be together.  Things would have been so different if..

But then, I wouldn't be the person I am today.  I guess that means I turned out ok, huh dad?  Would you be proud of me?  I joined Starfleet like you wanted.  I studied hard and I even got some promotions despite my lip.  I think I get that from you.  Now I'm going to get my chance, to really show them what I can do, and It might be my final blaze of glory.  I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, but I know this much: I love you dad, and I'm doing what I think I have to do.  The people I follow are good people and I trust them.  It's a hard fight, but in my experience, that usually means it's the right one.  You know how many times I've taken the easy path, right dad?  Well not this time. 

If by some stroke of cosmic luck, you're not dead and I survive tomorrow, everything you know about me will be challenged.  Please remember who I am, dad.  I'm your little girl and I promised you a long time ago that I would spend the rest of my life trying to make you proud.  I love you, dad.  And, I'm keeping the ships I bought you until you tell me where to send them.

..goodnight.."

End Recording
"Relationships are not my strong suit; I deal in evenings."
 - Jaya Thorne, Asst. Chief CONN Officer, Ensign [Show/Hide]

Re: DAY 06: Inner Space

Reply #14 –
[ Wenn Cinn | Senior Officer's Quarters | Deck 5]

”Personal Log, Stardate 57505.33. It’s been a while, and while I’m sure I’m not the only one who is making a log entry tonight, I do wonder how many of us will be able to review them later. It’s the night before our mission to Starbase 84. I wish I could say I didn’t have nerves, but that’s not true. To be honest, if I wasn’t nervous I think that would be a bigger worry.

We’ve trained hard and we all know why we are doing this. I confident in my team, well, all but one. I assigned Nathaniel Isley to myself. The disgraced wolf is a bit of an enigma. By all means, I know Renard to have trained the officer correctly but he’s a loose cannon and, well, a maverick. I’m going to have to keep a close eye on him during this mission and afterward I just hope that he actually tries to become part of the family here in Security. I have been lucky, those under me have bonded well but with every new man, it brings a new dynamic which threatens the entire group. After all that’s happened with him - with Carver, with Ida. I just hope I made the right choice in accepting his transfer request.” Cinn paused, taking the time to change topic rather than get catch himself making a long rant.

“Last night, I slept with Edena again. I guess I should feel happy about it but, in truth, I have concerns. I worry that I am falling for her. Throughout the day today, I have caught myself thinking about her - her eyes, her hair, her spots and it’s been distracting. When I am away from her, I find myself pining but when we are together, I can’t help but worry about those inside of her.

Illya woke me while we slept and I was a little... overhanded in dealing with her. That grifter can be an issue but it’s not her that is the problem. It’s Jona. Now I know that her past hosts can take over while Edena is asleep, how can I ever trust her inside my quarters? Who knows tricks an ex-officer of Starfleet Intelligence can use to gain access to my logs and sensitive information?

If she was any other crewmember I would be with her in a heartbeat, however, with the current crop of people inside her, I don’t see how we can be together. I just hope I can control my heart and get it to follow what my head is telling me to do. How do you even tell someone that you love them but can’t be with them?” Cinn sighed, exasperated. “Prophets knows.”

For a brief moment, he put his head into his hands. He wanted to say more, to explain his feelings in a better, more articulate manner. Instead, words failed him and he could only muster up three more.
[/color=darkgoldenrod]“Computer, End Log.”[/color]
 
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