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Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #50 –
Maya's large hazel eyes narrowed as she tilted her head to one side.  "I must have your thoughts," she said as raised a hand and spread her long spidery fingers to touch Lahkesis' face.  It was an uncanny miracle that the neural fibers in the girl's body had duplicated the neural network of anthropomorphic species throughout the galaxy to such a degree that a Vulcan could touch her thoughts. 

Unfortunately, a mind touch allows communication both ways.  Lahkesis could sense shame and self-loathing from the little Vulcan, but soon that sensation was replaced by surprise, sexual titillation and overwhelming joy flavored with motherly pride and a touch of relief.  It was clear that the green blooded physician believed that nothing was wrong with Lahkesis.  On the contrary, she seemed to think that the willowy intern had achieved something important.

"Why Lahkesis," Maya's gentle smile wasn't the forced plastic one she normally used.  "I am so happy for you.  I wish to thank you for giving me such joy.  You have developed a sexual attraction to mammalian species.  I am so relieved.  Now that you've acquired the ability to be attracted to others, you have one less reason to be alone.  This is a cause for celebration," she added as she stood up on tiptoes and hugged her.  "You're developing so fast..." she murmured wistfully. 

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #51 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay

As the Vulcan's fingers touched her face and she felt the rush of their minds touching Lahkesis was reminded of why exactly she disliked telepathic communication. There was a sudden lurch in the pit of her stomach as her mind flooded with additional information, some of it she could immediately process, some of it simply overwhelming her. She told taste the emotions of the other woman and something, something buried under the surface, slipped into her mind. Though while the contact was still in place the Maya's shame became her shame, Maya's self-loathing became her own self-loathing.

Lahkesis finally did breath easy once the connection was broken. "Well...?" she asked hoping that the brief contact between their minds was enough to give the Vulcan Doctor some answers and to make it so she did not have to actually vocalize her shame.

"Why Lahkesis," The Vulcan said. "I am so happy for you.  I wish to thank you for giving me such joy.  You have developed a sexual attraction to mammalian species.  I am so relieved.  Now that you've acquired the ability to be attracted to others, you have one less reason to be alone.  This is a cause for celebration."

Lahkesis was just about to say something when the Vulcan hugged her and her mind went blank. She wasn't sure what to say or even how to feel.

"You're developing so fast..." Came a whisper from the green blooded woman.

Lahkesis found herself hugging the shorter woman back, though she was not tall she leaned down so Maya would not have to stand on tiptoes to continue hugging her.

She was relieved when the hug was over, though now she needed to ask what in her mind was a loaded question. She did not know what to expect the other woman to say.

"What... what do I do now? I am not a mammal so what is the purpose of me becoming sexually excited? I was under the impression it was only suppose to be the opposite gender that excited me, yet you are not. Please explain this to me." What started off as a single question quickly led into another, the desperation in her voice rising as her confusion did as well. "Please tell me my becoming sexually aroused because you were touching me will not affect our friendship."

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #52 –
Maya held Lahkesis' hand firmly but fortunately her mental barriers were back up and the girl could only feel the warmth of the neurologist's hand.  "You don't have to worry about that Lahkesis.  I am, and will always be your friend.  And you needn't concern yourself with your embarrassment either.  Everyone loses a measure of their dignity from their arousal, regardless of species.  Your reaction is perfectly normal," she assured her as she released her hand to stroke her cheek affectionately.

"You live in an enlightened age young one," the little Vulcan continued as she patted the taller woman on the shoulder.  "When I was your age a romantic attraction to the same sex would have gotten you ostracized but in the modern era the gender of your partner doesn't matter anymore.  You're free to love whomever you choose as long as they're a consenting adult.  Don't worry about the purpose of your attraction to others.  The purpose of your attraction is to allow you to form emotional bonds with those around you.  The ability to form a physical attraction to others is necessary for your psychological well-being.  That is why I'm so happy you have developed it."

Maya paused and her pale complexion acquired a greenish tint.  "And you needed be confused over your sexual attraction towards me," she assured her.  "It's a natural reaction to the bond of love and trust we share.  I entered the medical field as a sexual surrogate and I'm told the touch of my hands can be quite arousing."  At this point, Maya squinted, pursed her lips and jerked back while taking her hands off the poor girl.  "My apologies," she said as she massaged her fingers distractedly.   "I didn't mean to touch you inappropriately.  But you shouldn't feel ashamed.  I will accept you, no matter what."

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #53 –
As the Vulcan spoke Lahkesis stood silently, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. She did her best to keep eye contact, but she was constantly finding herself looking down at her feet awkwardly. Though the kind words of the other woman helped ease her awkwardness and shame, she remained uncomfortable.

She found herself looking at her hand, still firmly held in the hand of the green blooded woman standing in front of her. She was infinitely grateful at it was Maya and not someone else. Anyone else and it would have been all the more awkward. She knew she had to say something and after another moment she was ready to begin.

"N-no, it wasn't bad or unwelcome... I just wasn't expecting my body to react like that..." She replied and did her best to smile despite how she felt. She blushed a little redder as she looked up into the eyes of the other woman ."It was actually kind of nice..." She took a deep breath and did her best to steady herself. Her face was quite flushed and seemed to get more so as she went on. "I would not be opposed to perhaps a little more..."

OOC: sorry this is so short, I wrote it on my tablet and touchscreen keyboards slow me down so much.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #54 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]
 
"I am not sure that would be appro..." Maya stopped and squinted.  Why wouldn't it be appropriate?  Maya may have unofficially adopted this lovely child but she wasn't her biological mother, she was just a friend.  And did she want young Lahkesis to experiement with her newfound sexuality outside of Maya's protective supervision?  Her suffering at Phantom's hands had proved that some things should only be shared between people who already shared a bond, not complete strangers.  

Besides, wasn't this sort of coupling best done by two people who loved each other?  If she shared herself physically with young Lahkesis, they wouldn't be merely coupling, they would be 'making love'.  'Making love.'  Such a romantic term.  Too much fear, sorrow, and hatred had been made already.  When faced with such an emotional imbalance, wasn't making love the logical thing to do?  Maya loved Lahkesis.  She would make sure that any experimentation with intimacies between them was an enriching experience.

"No, you're right Lahkesis," Maya nodded.  "Something this personal that renders you so vulnerable should only be shared with someone you trust.  This isn't something you do with strangers; you should get to know someone before initiating intimacies.  I would be honored to acquaint you with the sensations of a romantic experience."

She ran the tips of her long spidery fingers over the girl's pale and exposed chest.  Tiny tingles of telepathic impressions from the Vulcan's fingers would stimulate Lahkesis' breasts if her body worked like a mammal's.  "You are so beautiful I have no doubt that when you acquire some confidence and experience your affections will be in great demand.  And with a little practice your kisses will soon become the most sought after ones in known space."

She stood up on tiptoes and put her arms around her neck, but since the girl was nine inches taller than she was kissing her would be awkward. 

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #55 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay

As the other woman touched her breasts Lahkesis was aware of her breath quickening. Her experience with sensuality had been limited to only what she had observed in recording and in person. In both of those she had seen very little of what could be considered foreplay. Though she was familiar with the concept, she had only ever seen what could only be described as pure animalistic passion. The act of sexual contact done for no other purpose then physical stimulation, no emotion involved.


She let out a slight gasp as she felt the telepathic impulses from the Vulcan's fingertips rush through her. The nerves that connected her skin to her brain were sufficiently more sensitive then the average humanoids as they suffered less signal degradation between neurons. As a result her skin felt like it was tingling as every nerve in her breasts felt like it was exploding with stimulation. Her breasts were unlike the majority of humanoids, as she did not have any mammary glands, instead they held the gland that created the enzyme that triggered her blooming. The direct stimulation of this gland was triggering her bloom far stronger then she had experienced before, her mouth falling slightly agape as she lost herself in the feeling of the moment.

She was so consumed by the sensation of the other's hand on her smooth skin that she was barely aware of her speaking at all. It was not until the other woman wrapped her arms around Lahkesis' neck and stood on her tiptoes, drawing the plant based woman into a soft, gentle kiss that Lahkesis was again aware of herself. She closed her eyes to let the sensory and telepathic input flood directly into her mind as she leaned down to make their heights more equal, or at least as much as she could.

Her first real kiss, the moment consumed her more than even the sensation of the green-blooded woman's fingers on her breasts. She was lost in the feeling of the other woman's lips against her own, they felt so hot, the heat seeping into her, flooding through her body. It felt like every square inch of her was hot, she was actively becoming warmer to the touch as it seemed that not only her hair was becoming bioluminescent, but in addition the thin blood like substance underneath her smooth skin began to emit a soft glow.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #56 –
[Amelya Duv | Sickbay] Attn: Zeozine

Amelya listened to the twins as they discussed the matter of intercourse or sexual contact with others and she smiled a bit while holding the PADD against her chest. She looked at both of them as they continued their conversation and she eventually interrupted them "Right, well... Vinata, I'll schedule a meeting with the counselor on a later time, but right now I'm afraid I'll have to take my leave." She said friendly and nodded at both of them "Hylota, I trust you will take care of anything your brother needs. If you need anything else you can address lt. cmdr. Nicander." After saying her goodbyes to the twins she took her leave and vanished from the main sickbay.


OOC: Sorry for the short post and the late response, totally forgot I owed someone a tag here!

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #57 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

Lahkesis' passion burned so hot that Maya almost lost herself in the sensation of it, and the green blooded physician had to use all her remaining discipline to maintain control.  Lahkesis was a fragile flower and the little Vulcan wasn't going to overwhelm her.  But it was a matter of who was overwhelming whom.   Lahkesis' was uncannily invigorating.  Of course it was.  The girl inhaled carbon dioxide and exhaled oxygen, while Maya and everyone else onboard did the opposite.  The girl could probably hold a kiss longer than anyone alive.  

Maya had to struggle to slow her heart rate down and keep her skin from burning.  The sensation of the girl's smooth skin and hot mouth against her own was invigorating.   Maya felt like she was glowing and if she would have opened her eyes she would have noticed that Lahkesis was glowing, literally. 

Maya's long spidery fingers caressed down the girl's perfectly smooth shoulders and down to her shoulder blades.  The girl's silky, creamy skin tickled Maya's fingertips as she hungrily held Lahkesis' mouth with her own.  Maya shuddered as she held her and decided she better back off before she scared the girl.  Indeed she was becoming so lost in the girl's embrace that if she wasn't a Vulcan she would have frightened herself.  When she drew back and released her, it was Maya who had her eyes closed and her mouth open gasping for breath.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #58 –
[ Hylota & Vinata | Sickbay ]

Vinata nodded an reclined on his bedding. "Alright, I will take whatever help I can get...it would be nice to vent with someone other than my sister about the stress that I have been handling right now. Thank you for the help Ma'am and thank you for coming to see me." He smiled and at up to salute his former CO before she returned to the Harbinger. Hylota smile and nodded to Amelya . "I will be sure to get whatever help I need from him Ma'am, he has already agreed to help me with some small things I have. I should be able to get right into the swing of things in no time at all." Hylota smiled and saluted like her twin did as she saw her CO off and returned to looking after her brother and telling him what his limitations were, and what he should be doing, mostly stretches and things to gt hi body stretched after the hibernation he had been through.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #59 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay

As the kiss broke the glowing of Lahkesis' skin seemed to fade a bit and she let out a breath of almost pure oxygen she had been holding since they had begun kissing. Though the kiss had been awkward at first, a totally new experience for the young plant girl, it was not altogether unpleasant. Slowly her eyes fluttered open and she sighed, gazing at the other woman's face. It seemed almost different to her, changed as if in a whole new light.

To make matters more interesting she became acutely aware of the slick feeling between her thighs and the feeling of heat that pumped through her body. Though she had experienced sexual arousal before, this time felt very different. This time the feeling of something new filled her. She wanted to go further, to see what would happen if she took this encounter to it's logical conclusion.

But she hesitated, uncertainty filling her. She didn't know what to do, how to progress. She would have to guess and hope she did not screw up. Slowly she tentatively reached out a hand and dragged it over the fabric of Maya's uniform covering her breast. Her long fingers lingering, unsure where to go or what to do, only that they wished to stay in contact with the other woman, even if they were separated by the layers of fabric.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #60 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

Maya smiled gently and placed her hand on the back of Lahkesis', gently guiding the other woman's hand over her own breast.  "Computer activate privacy seal on doors," she ordered.  "Authorization Maya, code one, six one, three eight."

"Authorization recognized," a disembodied woman's voice responded. "Privacy seal activated."

Without a word Maya opened the seam of her blouse and and removed the top part of her uniform.  She let Lahkesis run her hand over the sports bra the little Vulcan wore under it before removing that article of clothing as well.  She took Lahkesis' hand and placed it on her green nippled breast while her other hand ran her long spidery fingers through the glowing filaments that were Lahkesis' 'hair'. 

A relaxed natural smile was on Maya's face, the first one that had graced her features since coming aboard.  This wasn't forced or stilted like her other grins were.  This one came from within.   The sensation of her affection for Lahkesis washed over her body, overriding the exact and calculated biorhythms that she normally maintained.  At this moment, Maya understood what so many poets on so many worlds had tried to express when they attempted to describe the sensation of love.

Maya leaned forward and kissed the girl's chest.  Her tongue playfully exploring her fruit flavored nipples.  Her hands caressed the girl's back before moving down to explore the buxom curves of her hindquarters.  Lahkesis' skin was so unnaturally smooth it was like the skin of a newborn baby.  Lowering her psychic barriers, allowed the willowy girl to sense impressions of how Maya truly felt about her.  Titillating and caressing the adorable intern, Maya felt only joy. 

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #61 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay

As the other woman removed her top Lahkesis' uncertainty resolved into a curiosity she could not ignore.  She wanted to know everything she could about this new feeling, everything she touched had a new feeling, it felt like every nerve in her body was alive. Sensation flooded into her brain, almost overwhelming her. Her long fingers moved delicately over the fabric of the sports bra and once that was removed they moved smoothly over the other woman's breast, her hand and fingers being effortlessly guided by the green-blooded woman she was touching.

Normally she would have spent hours at a computer console, reading through everything she could find on the subject. She had never learned by doing. Almost everything she knew was the result of a data upload to her juvenile brain shortly after her biological birth and from the books she had read since then. She had plenty of opportunity to engage and experiment sexually while at the academy, but her curiosity about it had started far more recently.

She was so lost in the sensation of touching the other woman and the new feeling that she was not aware of Maya reaching up and beginning to touch the brightly colored filaments that made up her hair. The sensation and direct connection to her brain from the filaments, especially the nucleus accumbens, one of the key pleasure centers in her brain, caused her to let out a surprised, yet pleasurable gasp.

In that moment all of the mental guards and insecurities melted away, her mind laid bare. All of her secrets, the inner turmoil she felt about her nature as nothing more than a copy, all that she was, all that she ever had been, was laid out for the other woman to see. Deeper than inner mind meld the intimacy that the poor plant based girl shared in that moment was beyond anything she had ever felt. Her mouth hung open and her eyelids drooped as her skin began to glow once more. The glow of her hand casting almost a ghostly half light over the breast and nipple of the lightly green tinted woman in front of her.

She was barely even aware of the kiss to her chest, only the continued joining of the Vulcan's and the Teslyliac's minds, going beyond mire sensuality and into something akin to true intimacy.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #62 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

Maya's mouth kissed and licked up the girl's chest towards her neck.  She stopped and groaned as Lahkesis opened her mind to her, the girl's thoughts and secrets exposed for Maya to see.  Maya held her tight with one arm around her back and the other gliding through the girl's 'hair', gasping and groaning as she was overcome by her reaction to the girl's psyche. 

The trouble with a mind touch, no scratch that, a mind meld was that all secrets were laid bare on both sides.  Lahkesis knew of Maya's cold and restrictive childhood, of how the little Vulcan's government selected her for medical service in order to take advantage of her high psi rating and use her as a sexual surrogate for patients undergoing the affliction of ponn farr.   She knew of the little Vulcan's trepidation when the Vulcan High Command of two centuries ago discouraged the use of telepathy and began outright prohibiting it.  Lahkesis knew of the resentment Maya felt when she discovered that the rituals of procreation could be performed outside of the terrible ordeal of the ponn farr and that most Vulcans were aware of this.

Lahkesis could feel Maya's sense of freedom upon entering the Interspecies Medical Exchange and living amongst the Denobulans and the Terrans.  The freedom of choice, the freedom of expression, the freedom of sexual orientation was dizzying.  She felt Maya's shame at her people's reaction to the Xindi crisis of 2153 and the little physician's sense of duty when she offered her services to Earth's preFederation Starfleet.

She knew Maya's sense of loss at the decimation of the NX-04 Discovery and her wonder that the energy discharge at the Battle of Cheron had somehow deposited the battered hulk and the handful of survivors two hundred and twelve years into the future where they were rescued by the USS Imperator, where the little Vulcan met the ship's counselor Jien Ives who introduced her to the new century.  

Lahkesis knew her thrill at discovering the existence of the United Federation of Planets, where the citizens of all member worlds had the right of choice, freedom of expression, and the right to any sexual preferences their psychology and physiology dictated.  And she knew what the Federation meant to Maya and why the little Vulcan would sacrifice her life, her freedom, and her honor to preserve it. 

Maya didn't want Lahkesis to have access to her memories.  There were horrible things in there that would drive the poor girl away from others.  If the girl fixated on Maya's recent encounter with Phantom she would be afraid of her body and afraid of others, condemning her to a life of solitude.  That was why Maya released her emotions from the leash that had been put on them since birth to let Lahkesis know exactly what she thought of her.

Maya's entire body tingled when she allowed herself to feel just how much she loved Lahkesis.  The girl was a beautiful flower, a promise for the future, a treasure that should be protected but should also be shared with the universe.  Lahkesis had her whole life in front of her, and represented to Maya all of the children of the Federation who needed to be protected from the creatures that had secretly taken over Starfleet.  She was the symbol for all they were fighting and dying for.   Starfleet had been tasked to seek out new life and there was Lahkesis, searching for where she belonged in the universe.  If it took Maya's last dying breath, she'd make sure that she had a chance to find it.

Maya sat up and took a deep breath, taking her hand off the girl's head and placing them on her thighs.  Maya forced herself to slow down, and take it one step at a time.  This wasn't an indulgence in the little Vulcan's pleasure, this was a learning experience for a precious girl in a safe and friendly environment.  Maya had little doubt that Lahkesis would be the most popular girl in Starfleet if she knew how to kiss properly.  She sat up on the edge of the isolation tank and beckoned the girl forward.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #63 –
Lahkesis Saugn |Sickbay

It was all to much for the young plant girl. The flow of information was reduced to feelings and colors, darkness blooming into light, shadows consuming and being pushed back by brilliant colorful lights. The emotions and the sensation of the psychic connection itself all but consumed her. She could not hold back her own emotions and memories as in an instant the moments of Lahkesis' life moved between them. The cold white lights of the research facility, the confusion as the numbers of her sisters dwindled, the deep hatred of those who kept her in the small room, the pain of the tissue samples taken oh so many times from every corner of her body.

Then there was the fire and a secret, pain and guilt.

Then came the blinding light of freedom, rescue from a Federation ship and a new home. Finally was the drive for something more, the hope of the academy.

Then Suddenly Lahkesis breathed and found herself back in the moment, the past slipping back into her memory. Only something remained, something not her own. A memory an emotion. Something she could not identify it was buried so deep. She was suddenly afraid. There were monsters...

And then Maya withdrew her hand from the young plant girl's hair and for a moment all was cold. The Vulcan, her friend and mentor, stepped away from her and the space between them felt like miles, stretching before her. She unconsciously took a step forward, trying to close the space and as Maya sat down and beckoned her closer Lahkesis obeyed without a second thought, her eyes looking over the face of the other woman searching for something unspeakable. Something had changed in her eyes, an unspoken truth. If this was love then there was something that could taint even this. Ghosts of fear and pain drifted through her mind, phantoms in the wind.

In a single movement she fell forward, wrapping her arms around the other woman and pressing her head into her chest, her ear to the soft green tinted skin of the other woman's chest. She could hear Maya's heart beat and it brought her comfort. She relaxed, though the fear did not pass.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #64 –
[ Maya| Sickbay, Isolation ]

"There-there my darling," Maya said as she hugged the tall willowy woman and rocked her gently against her body.  It was a nonsensical phrase she had heard in several movies that she had watched over two centuries ago that was supposed to provide comfort and for once the little Vulcan understood meaning of the phrase.  The demons that frightened Lahkesis were 'there-there' rather than 'here-here', i.e. distant and unthreatening.  As for the nickname, Maya really did think of Lahkesis as darling.  The possessive was grossly inappropriate, but Maya felt possessive and protective of the girl.  It was important to give the vegetable based girl enough freedom to form new relationships and not selfishly try to keep Lahkesis all for herself.   "I won't let anyone hurt you.  If you're ever in danger, I will know," she said as she ran her hand through the hair-like filaments on her head.  

It hurt while Lahkesis was afraid like this, but it was essential for the girl to know that she was not alone.   Clearing her mind of all distractions she focused solely on Lahkesis and brought her mental frequencies in synchronization with the willowy girl.  Now Lahkesis would be able to sense Maya's presence and even engage in limited communication as long as Maya didn't stray more than six meters away or so.  If they stood within one meter they might even be able to telepathically communicate in actual sentences.  The effect would fade in a few days or so but at least Maya and Lahkesis would know if the other felt a strong emotion like panic or joy as long as they weren't too far away from each other.  It was an excellent technique for mothers with accident prone children, but it was hard to do with someone whose sense of identity was too strong.


OOC:  This will come in real handy in Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [Supplementary: Hostile Takeover].

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #65 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay, Isolation Room 2

Love, the concept alone brought strange notions to the young plant girl's mind. And yet she knew she loved the other woman. She knew she loved her sisters. And she knew that the love she felt for her sisters was different than the love she felt for Maya. Yet she could not figure out if it was an emotion or simply a way of expressing the connection. In addition having never had a mother or even so much as a maternal figure Lahkesis knew nothing about what sort of relationship mothers and daughters shared. In all of this of one thing she was certain, the feeling of Maya's hand running through her hair relaxed her. Her breathing became more even and her pulse slowed.

After a moment she pulled away from the tender embrace of the Vulcan and stood up. Confusion danced across her face as she tried to understand what she had felt and why she had felt it. She had been afraid before, she had faced her own exile and separation from her sisters, and it had frightened her. Yet this was different. She had to ask, she had to understand. "I do not understand. I have come understand sexuality as pleasurable, yet when our minds touched I felt fear and pain. How can something pleasurable also evoke feelings such as those?" She was nothing if not naïve. She knew very little about sex, rape and sexual degradation were concepts completely foreign to the girl.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #66 –

[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

Maya's eyebrows rose as she tightened her lips, but with those arched upswept eyebrows, it was hard to tell how well she was conveying regret.  "Sexuality can be pleasurable to one participant while being painful to the other," she explained while stroking Lahkesis' arm gently.  "There are those who paradoxically cannot feel arousal without degrading their partner.  I have the irrational hope that you never encounter one of these people, intimately or otherwise."   The little Vulcan's fingers glided up to the girl's neck and shoulders as she tried to relax the girl with a sensual massage.  "I will do everything in my power to ensure that you never find yourself alone with such an individual as long as you are serving with me.  There is no sacrifice I wouldn't make to ensure your safety."

Maya wondered what lengths she would have to do to fulfill that boast.  If the Harbinger pilots visited again would she do something irrational like place Lahkesis back into isolation?  Would Maya attempt to restrict her freedoms using verbal commands, despite being the same rank?  And if harm should actually come to Lahkesis, would Maya's Hypocritical Oath apply to the parties responsible?

The fear was still in Lahkesis' eyes.  It was a sight that was painful to Maya even without telepathic contact, let alone with the mental link she had created.  After squinting at the girl and tilting head for a moment, she made a decision. "Do not fret little one, I will teach you the art of Shunanju an unarmed martial art practiced by my people that focuses on pressure points and nerve pinches.  With your natural talent and knowledge of anatomy you should be a quick study.  My conditioning as a sexual surrogate leaves me at a disadvantage when it comes to fending off unwanted attentions, but you shouldn't have that difficulty.  When we find the time I will train you to protect yourself." 


Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #67 –
As she listened something became clear to Lahkesis. The source of the pain and fear she had felt in the mind meld, the hidden truth. Someone had hurt her friend, her mentor. Someone had used sexuality as a weapon. And yet she could not bear the idea of being forced to hurt another life form. She could not find it in herself to do such a thing, it seemed to violate some unspoken rule. She hung her head, ashamed of this. "I do not wish to bring harm to others. If degrading others can is the only thing that will arouse them then I will allow myself to be degraded, to ensure that they do not degrade someone else. I am more durable, my body will heal faster then most humanoids. Surely it would be better for them to degrade me."

There was an uncertainty in her voice. She had never experienced sexuality with another person, outside of this moment, she could not understand what it would even mean to be degraded by another person for the sake of sexuality. She only knew that she wanted to protect her friend. She did not know if she would be strong enough to take such a thing or what it would do to her. She remembered running and hiding when the parasitic virus had taken the crew and driven to commit violent acts against one another. Would protecting her friend require her to be subject to such an attack? She dreaded the thought, but yet knew she would do it to protect Maya.

She tentatively reached out and laid her hand over Maya's heart, her long fingers lightly stroking the skin. Something inside her hurt and pained at the thought of anyone hurting Maya in such a way. She would take that pain, she would rather take that pain a thousand fold then see her friend hurt. "I do not want anyone to hurt you again."

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #68 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

Maya had to struggle not to suppress her reaction to Lahkesis' resolve.  It was the same resolve Maya herself had for Lahkesis.  The thought of Lahkesis willingly allowing herself to be hurt by someone like Phantom was almost too much to bear.  At this close proximity they had no secrets, save the secrets they kept from themselves. 

Maya hugged herself and drew back so Lahkesis wouldn't have to feel the full weight of her grief.  It took all of her willpower to allow herself to feel just how much the thought of that poor girl martyring herself hurt.  Like all Vulcans, Maya had been conditioned to suppress any emotion that was strong enough to show.  The more powerful the emotion, the stronger the reflex action to exclude the sensation from her consciousness became. 

But Maya had left Vulcan over two hundred years ago in order to feel her own sentiments if she wished.  She had left home so she could have the freedom to not simply be a member of her society, but to experience what it meant to be herself.  She loved Lahkesis, and she was going to feel every emotion, every reaction, every sensation that the girl evoked, no matter how hard it was to do so.

Hugging herself and shivering, Maya sank to her knees and wept.  She didn't want the girl to see her like this but with the telepathic link they temporarily shared there was no hiding it from her.  Maya wanted her to know just how hard the life of a sexual surrogate really was, what sacrifices had to be made.  If Lahkesis had chosen such a role for herself the girl had to make that decision with her eyes open.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #69 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Isolation, Sickbay

Seeing her friend suddenly sink to her knees and began to cry caused Lahkesis to suddenly panic. She had wanted to protect her friend from pain, and yet it seemed she had caused her pain. She did not know how to react, what to do. Immediately her medical training kicked in and she grabbed the nearby medical tricorder and flipped it open, only realizing that it would likely tell her nothing she could not already see with her own to eyes. She had taken a few classes in psychology, but her lack of understanding of most humanoid experience got in the way.

She knew nothing of sexual surrogacy and even if she had it was likely she would not chose that life for herself, she only meant to defend and protect her friend from those like the phantoms that seemed to haunt her. She bit her lip, knowing she had to do something to help; yet she feared all she could do was make matters worse. She glanced to the door and wondered if she should get someone else.

No, this was her doing and she had to fix it.

With little choice she set the tricorder down and sat down on the floor in front of Maya. She felt suddenly very guilty, unsure of even why she did. Was she not supposed to protect her friend from those who would hurt her? It was all so confusing. She tilted her head as she thought, gazing at the green-blooded woman uncertainty playing across her face. She bit her lip and frowned. She knew she would have to say something, she felt like she had hurt her friend and she did not know why or even how she had done it.

"Please don't be upset... I'm sorry," she breathed, her demeanor not unlike a young child attempting to comfort an elder, but having not concept of why they were upset.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #70 –
 [ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

The tricorder in Lahkesis' hands revealed Maya's fatigue and the neural activity in her Vulcan brain, an organ once described as "a puzzle, wrapped inside an enigma, housed inside a cranium."  Maya was relaxing her mesiofrontal cortex, the part of her brain that allowed the little Vulcan her uncanny control of her emotions.  The neural activity in her skull was currently erratic for a Vulcan, and Lahkesis didn't have to be a brain surgeon like Maya and Nicander to know that the greenblooded neurologist had been under a strain for an extended time.

Despite the girl's unfamiliarity with psychology, the temporary psychic link Maya had formed with her gave her an inkling into the little Vulcan's viewpoint.  Maya was horrified when she witnessed the same martyr instinct that the time traveling Vulcan had displayed countless times in the past.  She didn't want that for Lahkesis, she wanted better for her.  She felt responsible for subliminally placing such notions in her head.  Lahkesis had logically determined that she was more capable of withstanding sexual abuse than others without ever having experienced coitus, abusive or otherwise. 

"Please don't be upset... I'm sorry," the girl sighed, sounding like a daughter trying to console a parent. 

Maya opened her eyes and blinked the tears away.  "No, I am the one who should apologize Little One," she said calmly as she rose to her feet to face the taller woman.  "I subjected you to too much too soon.  I allowed my selfish desire to share myself with you override my judgment.  For that I am truly sorry."  She stood before the naked girl, the tearstains on her face and her incomplete uniform the only signs that she was anything but an emotionless Vulcan.  Even the temporary psychic link was almost closed, allowing Lahkesis to sense her presence but nothing more.

Then Maya realized that cutting herself off from the willowy girl would cause Lahkesis to believe that she was at fault somehow.  That was a mistake the little Vulcan wasn't willing to make.  She opened her mental barriers to her and hugged Lahkesis tightly, nursing on one of her fruit flavored nipples as she did so.  The girl was going to know love before the end came no matter what.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #71 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay, Isolation

The plant girl's mind raced as she did her best to understand. She had seen violence and brutality in her research and yet she had never experienced. She had never known another's touch in anything close to a sensual manner until this moment. And yet the woman whom had touched her in such a way had apologized for pushing her, only Lahkesis did not feel as if she had been pushed. In fact she had quite enjoyed it, right up until the moment she had felt the fear and pain. And now it felt as if the distance between them was increasing all the more, though neither had moved any farther away.

Though she was not completely aware of it the link between them had all but closed and though she could still feel the presence of the other woman, that was all. She had almost gotten used to the feeling of someone else so close to her mind and now that it was fading she felt suddenly cold and alone. A small being in a very large universe. She knew in that moment that she had done something wrong, that she had made some grave mistake. And she desperately wanted to take it back, yet she did not know what the mistake was or how to take it back even if she could.

Then when Maya move close again and hugged her Lahkesis breathed a little easier, though as the shorter woman's lips wrapped around her nipple she took a sharp intake of air as she felt her body respond. She could not understand much about this, only what could best be described as a roller coaster of emotions, twisting and turning through her. Even if she could have, she would not have even tried to hide her emotions, they bubbled up displaying themselves open. She was confused, a little scared, and aroused; a dangerous mixture. Yet in all of this she had a single clear thought, she trusted Maya, with all of her heart and with every fiber of her being.

She wrapped her arms around the other woman, and then suddenly paused. "Are you sure we should go on? I do not wish to make you upset again?" There was genuine concern in her voice, she did not want to hurt Maya again.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #72 –
[ Maya | Sickbay, Isolation ]

"Hm?" Maya opened her eyes and noticed that she had one of the girl's fruit flavored nipples in her mouth.  She had merely meant to hug Lahkesis tightly and reestablish their bond, but the height difference combined with the girl's nudity had resulting in the gesture being much more suggestive that intended.   She took her mouth off the girl's chest and looked around her.  The cold sterile surroundings of sickbay's isolation room seemed terribly inappropriate a setting to teach a girl the art of lovemaking. 

"No I don't think so Little One," Maya murmured with a hint of regret in her voice.  "A safe and familiar location like your personal quarters would be more conducive.  I think we should schedule this on our personal time, perhaps later today."

The little Vulcan looked up at Lahkesis and kissed her hand before moving away to fetch the girl's uniform that she had stored folded up in a box hidden under the console.  She handed Lahkesis her uniform before turning to pick up her own discarded shirt that she had draped over the chair.

"Do not fret, Little One."  Although Maya's face was composed as it normally was, Lahkesis could still perceive the older woman's tender feelings for her.  "If you need me, I am here for you."


OOC:  That's the problem with Vulcans.  They can never be spontaneous!  They gotta plan everything out and take all the surprise out of everything.

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #73 –
Lahkesis Saugn | Sickbay, Isolation

As she nodded and took the fresh uniform Lahkesis found herself wishing desperately she could understand what was going on. If she had done something why was Maya still being so nice to her and seeming to wish to continue the activity later on, but yet the mood seemed to shift from sensual to now quite formal. They had begun to be sensual in this location and now it was deemed inadequate with no difference that the poor plant girl could see. She could not help but begin to think that she was somehow unfit or that there was something wrong with her. Maybe the Vulcan woman had noticed some inadequacy in her body and that was why things had shifted.

Though she was not aware of it, she now for the first time felt shame, though she had no way to identify the emotion having never experienced it before. She busied herself with pulling her standard issue underwear and bra on before looking up at Maya. She had to know, she had to understand what had changed. Perhaps she could correct it if it were a simply anatomical mistake. "Am I in some way flowed? Is that why this location now longer works to experience sensuality? Are special tools required?"

Re: Chapter 03: The Captain of My Soul [03: Pain & Guilt]

Reply #74 –
"No of course not," Maya assured her.  "I just think that for your first time you deserve to have a comfortable bed."  Her large hazel eyes looked past the confused but hungry girl at the open isolation tank.  "You deserve to have someplace warm, and soft," she continued as she walked to Lahkesis' side and placed a finger into the vitamin enriched water that was a centimeter deep, "and moist."

The little Vulcan's face relaxed as she looked up at the girl.  "Perhaps you are right Lahkesis.  We have everything we need right here.  Climb back in and lie on your back if you are ready to continue," she gestured before going to the console and hitting a safety switch.   It would be most unbecoming if the lid closed and they had to be rescued after all.   At least if the worst happened, Maya wouldn't suffocate.  Lahkesis' oxygen rich breath would keep her alive without the Vulcan needing to enter a trance to slow her respiration.

When Maya turned back the girl was dutifully laying on her back, as eager as a sehlat cub.  Maya closed her eyes and grunted in concentration as she forced herself to relax her mesiofrontal cortex so she could fully experience her emotions.  When she opened her eyes again the girl was so cute the little Vulcan giggled.  Maya let her Vulcan brain curb her passions enough so she could climb into the isolation tank and straddle the willowy girl. 

As Maya gazed at Lahkesis' angelic face and ran her fingertips across the baby smooth skin of the plant girl's breasts she was once again struck by how beautiful she was, both within and without.  She was a girl anyone could fall in love with, as long as they had a shred of compassion and decency in them.  She let her feeling for the Lahkesis drift into the girl's mind so she'd know just how cherished and loved she really was. 
 
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